memorial day weekend.. (a mirror of the live journal entry)

[Miss Misery]

Sweet zombie jesus... I spent memorial day weekend back home.

I got there Friday, 10 minutes after getting home I get back on the freeway and head for UCLA.. my dad is in the medical center, recovering from a kidney transplant. It's hard for him to swallow his food, and he's got a couple of IV's in him. He cant even swallow pudding without it hurting. We get there at 1, leave at 9-- we head to San Bernandino to see my aunt and my two cousins.. and second cousin. My aunt and younger cousin are doped up because they're in pain and my older cousin now has a daughter. We're there till midnite. I am dead tired.

Saturday early in the morning we go back to ucla to hang out with my dad. My sister and I run some errands for my mom involving walks to the post office and a quick stop for boba. We're there till 8pm. I'm supposed to be at the american nightmare show, but after a whole day at the hospital.. I'm dead tired.After eating two monster enchiladas at this awesome hole in the wall mexican restaurant located on whittier blvd... in whittier, I drive to the GLass house and give my ticket to one of robert's friends--a hot one at that.. I spend about 2 hours at yanas abusing her computer then go home and fall asleep.

Sunday-- uhh, Sunday is a blur. Oh, I was interviewed for some internet thing by Justin and I spent more time at UCLA. At some point the day before I met Zach and Andrew, that was fun.

We get there around 10-11am, leave at 8pm. Again.. tired.

Monday we woke up late and got to UCLA at 11-noon i believe. Some aunts and my nana from my dad's side of the family show up. Some of my mom's cousins from ventura show up. Lotsa people to please, thus I take the children out... to stuff their lil' faces full of crap. This is the last day I spend with my dad, going to UCLA on tuesday (today) would have been hell and a half for my mom.

My dad was supposed to be out by friday, but he got really sick on thursday. so they postponed the discharge for tuesday (today..).. however, the kidney is working much slower than it should be, accompanied with the pain of swallowing food and water and the water retention itself. No dice on gettin out today. Instead, he needs to get an ultrasound, a biopsy and dialysis I believe. At some point in the weekend they did some hemodialysis.. I'm not sure why.

I've been constantly tired since I arrived-- but it's okay. I did good stuff. Once I got there I quit caring about the concert. Instead I took pictures of my dad and the surrounding area. Never seen so many people give the girl with the camera wierd looks. I didnt really care, my dad was okay with it. he was glad that i was at home, that i was taking pictures -- he mentioned something about how he'll look back at them and it'll be incentive for him never to show up there again (meaning the kidney will work.)

I'm more worried about my mom, however. she has to deal with so much that it literally makes my head hurt. she has to deal with my dad's recovery as well as my aunt and cousins.. she has to deal with family drama involving my dad's mom and sisters, and her own mom and dad... and ..just so much. i have no clue how she manages to wake up every morning and be like "okay time to start another day" instead of "please just leave me under the covers". anyone have any idea how much love and trust and confidence in one another you have to have to witness your husband go through what is probably one of the most traumatic events of their life? to wake up day after day next to the machines and the tubes and the bags that pretty much have become the love of your life? to see them in pain and know that the antibiotics and painkillers are about the only thing that can help them? ... and what about now-- nursing the recovery, having to set aside your own life and your own concerns and fears because one sign of weakness in you means you're not sure of what's going on, thus creating more fear in those around you.

I dunno.. i feel really bad. when one set of complications are gone a whole pile of new ones seem to arise. while leaving for santa cruz i spotted the central LA area from the sky and waved good bye to my daddy. I hope my prints come out okay.


2weeks.

[TwntyCent]

You'll be home soon...hopefully it all gets better from there.

[RTJ]

Damn.

I'm suddenly much happier with my boring life. Confucius say "May you live in -less- interesting times."

-- Rolly

[colonel]

Hang in there Caridad! Be strong for your Mom & Dad. It's all you can do.
I imagine your visit this weekend did more good for both of them than you might realise.

Sending Positive Vy Bra Shuns (ye-ah, poss ee tive) to you and yours.

[seekerofvisions]

Oh, I so hope your dad is well and hugs to your mom. I can only imagine what that must be like.

((hugs)) to you as well. <3

[BIG GABE]

the fragility of life breeds such sufferings. How we humans get through it is a mystery to me. Getting older is an education in pain in my experience. I hope the strength of your family continues in the face of adversity. And hopefully such adversity will subside.

[Miss Misery]

(from the lj entry)...

I've been calling my dad everyday since I left, since then he's doing much better. He's been granted patio previliges-- that means he gets to walk around outside and sit in the sun. According to my mom he really enjoys it, you would too if you've been kept inside a hospital room for 3 weeks. Depending on things he'll be released either Wednesday or Thursday. For good this time-- no iffy's. His only problem is he got a minor infection, and the doctors are just making sure they've got him on the antibiotics he needs to get rid of it. ****ing awesome... he'll be home when I go home. my mom's been with him every day since the surgery-- she's an awesome lady. she's got a lot to do and she's kept a cool head about it all.

Heh, they saw steven segal today, he just wont let go of his 'image'. that's LA fer ya.

..I'm quite glad things are getting good, not only in his life but in mine as well. Now all I gotta do is go home and start my life all over again.