Yallbonics...

[Zaphod Beeblebrox]

Heidi-greeting

Hire Yew-Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting, "Heidi, hire yew?"

Bard-verb, past tense of the infinitive "to borrow." Usage: My brother bard my pickup truck.

Jawjuh-The state north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner. Usage: My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck.

Bammer-state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum. Usage: A tornader jus went through Bammer and left $20,000 in improvements.

Munts-a calendar division. Usage: My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck and I ain'theard from him in munts.

Thank-cognitive process. Usage: Ah thank Ah'll have a bare.

Bare-noun, an alcoholic beverage made from barley, hops, and yeast. Usage: Ah thank Ah'll have a bare.

Ignert-adjective, not smart. See "Arkansas native."

Ranch-noun, a tool used fet tightnin' bolts. Usage: Ah thank Ah lef my ranch back in my pickup truck that my brother from Jawjuh bard.

All-noun, petroleum-based lubricant. Usage: Ah hope my brother puts all in my pickup truck.

Far-noun, a conflagaration. Usage: If they ain't no all in the truck, it'll catch far.

Tar-noun, a rubber wheel. Usage: Ah hope I don;t get no flat tar on the pickup truck.

Tire-noun, a tall monument. Usage: Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I hope I do see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

Retard-verb. To stop working.

Fat-verb, to engage in battle or combat. Usage: You youngens keep fat'n and Ah'm gonna whup ya.

Rats-noun, entitled to power or privledge. Usage: Southerners will fat for their rats.

Cheer-adverb, this place. Usage: Just set that bare rat cheer.

farn-adjective, not domestic. Usage: I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed, must be from some farn country.

Did-adjective, not alive. Usage: He's did, ain't breathin'.

Are-noun, colorless, odorless gas, oxygen. Usage: Ah cain't breathe, gimme some Are!

Bob War-noun, sharp, twisted cable. Usage: Boy, stay out from that bob war fence.

Jew Here-noun and verb, contraction. usage: Jew here that my brother got a job wif a bob war fence comp'ny?

Seed-past tense of "to see."

Haze-a contraction. Usage: Is Bubba smart? Nah, haze ignert. He ain't thanked a minnit 'n iz laf.

Gubmint-noun, a bureaucratic institution. Usage: them gubmint boys is shore ignert.

[Geoffrey]

Originally posted by Zaphod Beeblebrox

Ignert-adjective, not smart. See "Arkansas native."

oh, come on now.. our "best" president ever came from Arhuhnsaw

[Redfield]

OH MY LORD! That was funny stuff, man.