A random question... What do you think causes people to cry at weddings?

[Dreamy]

Unless he's a troll in human form, he'll be feeling it.

Oh he'll feel it. Will his emotions be shown in tears? No idea. He would lay his life down for his little girl so I am sure he will be fighting some tears when some man "no good enough for her" takes her away in marriage.

[Lulu]

Men cry at weddings too. I don't cry at weddings for someone I don't know well. One of my good girlfriends got married a few years. I really didn't think I would cry but I did when she walked down the aisle and I saw her husband choke up. I was happy for her. I wasn't jealous, not once did I think "I wish that was me" or anything like that. I simply was happy for her and happy she'd found a good guy.

[TopsyTurvy]

People cry for many reasons, I've seen men cry at sports. This troll thing that women are emotional wrecks is bullshit.

[AlbertJ]

Women cry at weddings because they know they've sucked their last dick.

Obviously you're not married.

[AlbertJ]

This is actually a pretty interesting question.

I think it might have to do with the emotional conflict of all the romantic ideals of marriage, combined with the realities of marriage that we all know about, create a sort of psychological friction that lead to tears. If someone's still single and witnessing a marriage, the effect is amplified, because it brings up all sorts of feelings about being single, feeling lonely, and fearing that they'll never be happily married like they are. At the same time, you're still happy for the couple, but also a bit jealous, and the emotions are hard to reconcile, so people let out a few tears.

Response greatness. Marriage is one of those things that go well beyond reason.

[Dick Tator]

Obviously you're not married.

Obviously you don't understand that single sentence can be interpreted several ways.

[SivVulk]

as an aside Lily, I'm also an INTP

With regards to the OP, I agree with what Optimus said, though I also think it's important to add that in general weddings create a great deal of empathy so people aren't just expressing their emotions but to an extent those of others.

There is also that sense of relief as organizing weddings and taking part in them usually involves a lot of stress. Which brings me to another point... the word "stress" is largely perceived as negative (similar to cholesterol) and just as there is a significant difference between HCLs and LCLs there is also a distinction to be made with stress.

When we say we are feeling stressed we typically mean "distressed" as this is negative/unhealthy stress. During wedding preparations everyone involved in the planning will more than likely feel distressed during the ordeal. Positive stress is termed "eustress". This is the sensation you get during or after a major achievement. Regardless of what stress you are feeling you generally are more emotional and exhibit this through your behaviour be it the pitch of your voice, or visual manifestations such as tears.

And to go along with what Topsy said, the last wedding I went to was one in which my friend was the bride. She was about the only one who got through her speech without significant pauses or tears, while the parents as well as the groom and the best man had a very tough time holding back tears. In fact the groom was pretty incoherent and no alcohol wasn't a factor because it was not served at all during the reception.

[lily]

I'm a little late here (sorry) but I wanted to get back to this thread.

Well, I had some thoughts on this. My little theory here isn't something that I read anywhere, it's just something I was thinking about (and I could be wrong, of course.)

I think it has to do with beauty...not physical beauty, but the type of beauty that is intangible and touches us on a deeper level. There are certain things in life that point toward something beyond itself, something transcendent. God is love. (1 John 4:8) And from a biblical perspective, marriage was created and instituted by God Himself. So if there is genuine love between the bride and groom, and true joy that can be felt, then the reason people can get teary is because it's an experience of the Divine. It's the type of beauty that goes beyond ourselves, and points to something bigger... the source (God, the Creator). And when THAT happens, I think everyone but the most hard-hearted can't help but be moved in some way - whether it's tears or goose bumps or whatever.

It's not just weddings... Another example would be the birth of a baby. Most would say that tears at a birth are tears of joy... and yes, it is that but I think it's something more. A person doesn't even have to know the mother who just gave birth to be moved by that event. Why, because I think it's another example of something that has God's fingerprints all over it. Again, not just physically, but beyond that. I could elaborate, but I think at least some of you understand what I mean.

Alright, I'll put on my flame suit now.

[lily]

as an aside Lily, I'm also an INTP

Yay for INTPs!

[lily]

Wow, it's slow here tonight! (where is the usual night crew?) Anyway, I just re-read my post and I think parts of it sound kind of confusing. I tried to edit it, but it was too late to do that. Maybe hadit or someone else can chime in or put it into different words? Like I said, those are just some ideas I was thinking about, so maybe later I'll be able to articulate it more clearly.

[optimus]

I see what you're saying Lily, and I agree with the beauty part of it, however marriage was not created by God. It was created by man.

[Lulu]

Who doesn't serve booze at a wedding reception? Even if you don't drink, you still serve booze.

But I do think Sivvulk's right, it's empathy.

[Sparkly Mary]

Who doesn't serve booze at a wedding reception? Even if you don't drink, you still serve booze.

But I do think Sivvulk's right, it's empathy.

Independent, fundamentalist Baptists don't. Well, unless you're me and say, "It's my wedding, and we're drinking at the reception". But then again, I'm a heathen so it shouldn't have surprised anyone that I had booze there. We just couldn't have the reception at the church since we would be drinking.

As for crying at births, the only births I get emotional at, are my own, or the rare story I see on TV where a Mama has to fight for the birth she wants and gets it. These usually involve completely natural births, and having had 3 of them myself, I know the pure, raw power that trusting your body during birth is and it chokes me up every time.

[Notalibtard]

How did I end up in this emotional chick thread. Help!

[optimus]

How did I end up in this emotional chick thread. Help!

Because you cry at weddings.

[Dick Tator]

I'm also an INTP

Bullshit. Everyone who thinks they "think outside the box" claims to be an INTP.

[Dreamy]

How did I end up in this emotional chick thread. Help!

Need directions to your man cave?

[9ball8]

From a genetic perspective, he's giving up the best piece of himself.

There. Fixed the creepy part.

Dad also cries because his skull fills with memories of his little girl, as she was growing up. Milestones were mentioned. Nostalgia, kind of like an emotional water balloon popping. That water's gotta come out somewhere.

[Dick Tator]

There. Fixed the creepy part.

The intellectual part, you mean.

[9ball8]

The intellectual part, you mean.

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar...