In a relationship, what's your take on it? Do you like it? Find it annoying? Indifferent towards it?

I used to hate it for some reason. It'd make me feel like he didn't trust me.

I've really grown to like it though for some reason, and I'm actually offended if when I'm in a relationship he/she doesn't get a little upset when other guys look. :hmm:

I think it has a lot to do with control, and less with trust like I once thought.

Early in a relationship or before it's really a commited relationship I like my guy to show signs of jealousy.. But once we are settled into a full-fledged relationship, it can annoy me..Depending on how bad he has it, you know.

I have struggled for years, with some success, to overcome the insane jealousy and feeling of betrayal that my husband is aware that I am not the only human female in the world. It wasn't that I didn't trust him, I had a lot of abandonment issues and insecurities from childhood that took a long time to overcome. If he acts jealous it is a little annoying, like he will announce (somewhat jokingly) that "he knows about my affair with so-and-so" (lol) just because I talked to an old friend on the phone or something. But it happens so rarely, and I know he is doing it because he wants me to see that he cares.

Jealousy is an emotion that served our ancestors remarkably well. Unfortunately today it (along with our other reptilian instincts) can be counter-productive. When used correctly it is a good thing, just like anger or aggression. I actually find having little flares of jealousy out of myself or my partner to be quite arousing.

I little is healthy because it shows that you care that you mean a lot to each other but a lot is unhealthy :shrug:

it is cute in the beginning and quickly grows very very very very irritating.

...and then very dangerous...

Actually if it is an issue in the VERY beginning of a relationship it is a big red flag that the person could be overly possessive and/or abusive. I "dated" this one guy when I was a teenager (for a VERY short time) and we were at an arcade, and some other guy was talking to me, just being friendly, not hitting on me or anything, and the dude I was with almost beat the crap out of him for speaking to me. Then he started laying on the pressure really thick to have sex and I ran like hell from him. A few years later I saw him with a heavily pregnant girlfriend. I really hope he was nice to her.

I'm the same way Kellet. Not for the same reasons though.

If at fist he is jealous I get scared because he's getting too serious too fast. :hmm:

but later on it's nice.

it is cute in the beginning and quickly grows very very very very irritating.
:yeahthat:

"You don't own me, I'm not just one of your many toys
You don't own me, don't say I can't go with other boys

And don't tell me what to do
And don't tell me what to say
And please, when I go out with you
Don't put me on display, 'cause

You don't own me, don't try to change me in any way
You don't own me, don't tie me down 'cause I'd never stay

Oh, I don't tell you what to say
I don't tell you what to do
So just let me be myself
That's all I ask of you

I'm young and I love to be young
I'm free and I love to be free
To live my life the way I want
To say and do whatever I please

A-a-a-nd don't tell me what to do
Oh-h-h-h don't tell me what to say
And please, when I go out with you
Don't put me on display

I don't tell you what to say
Oh-h-h-h don't tell you what to do
So just let me be myself
That's all I ask of you

I'm young and I love to be young
I'm free and I love to be free
To live my life the way I want"

:nice:

I am an incorrigible flirt. I flirt because it gives me opportunities at word play that I find amusing and enjoyable on a completely non-sexual level. I flirt because I enjoy the act of flirting. If a woman has a problem with that, then she shouldn't be with me. Plain and simple, if my behaviour is not what a woman is looking for, then she should look elsewhere because I have no reason, need, nor desire to change myself at this point in my life. Especially when it comes to flirting.

Jealousy is wasted on me, and I don't bother spending time or energy on a woman who gets jealous that easily.

When I commit to a woman, I commit. I have never faltered in my committment in the past even when offers were literally laid in my lap, and I don't intend to ever start. The reason I choose to commit to a relationship is because I believe that the person I choose to be with can and will offer me everything that I would like to have and is worth the committment to keep her around. If that is not abundantly clear to the woman in question, then the relationship would get off to a seriously flawed beginning, and lead to a very quick ending.

If, however, she doesn't have that trust in me, then there's no way that we will enter into a committed relationship. And if she gets jealous before there's any committment involved, then I will very promptly thereafter show her the door and force her exit from my personal life.

My life is my life, and if you don't like the way I live it you can leave it. Getting jealous will only make things worse.

Jealously has no place in a relationship.