My girlfriend's a year (and a half) older than me, so while i'm still stuck in Suffolk in my last year before university she's already off 3-5 hours/ £30 train journey away in Kent.

She's calmed down a bit now, but during her first week (or "freshers week" even) she drunk an awful lot more and she felt very lonely and avoided sleeping in her own room for ages. She'd made a lot of new friends (bless her, she was so worried she wouldn't) and one of these was a guy who we'll call Bob.

My girlfriend slept at Bobs house for most of her first week, in his bed. Now, me and my girlfriend have this thing about honesty; we're both completely honest with each other, no lies or significant secrets. She told me what happened. She slept in his bed, he slept in the bed too (after asking if he could move from the floor and she felt it would rude to say he couldn't sleep in his own bed. They didn't hug/cuddle, but coz the bed wasn't huge they were pretty close. She also said Bob tried to kiss her once but she stopped him, and she thought he was just confused due to sleepiness/alcohol as Bob does have a girlfriend. I asked her if there was anything else i should know about and she said no, so i left it at that. I was a little anxious but had no ill feelings towards her (though i had a few towards Bob).

Now, a few months on, i have only just been told by her that actually he also tried to remove her underwear a few times late at night, but claimed he didn't remember anything in the morning, and that once he'd tried to *coughcough* "touch her intimately" (as i'm not sure what i can say outside of the everything forum) but she'd stopped him. She's only just told me this last night, despite how we're always honest and i'd asked her if anything else had happened. Apparently she'd felt really bad about it, and considered telling me, but people she'd spoken to about it said not to tell me coz it would only upset me. I asked her if she'd have told me if they hadn't said not to and she said yes.

So, i didn't get upset at all, coz she hadn't really done anything wrong, it was all Bob (who've i have actually met and he seems an alright sort of bloke when his hormones are in check, and besides, i can kinda sympathise with him; "hot girl in my bed, ery touchable, whoo!"), and i also admired that she'd told me this even after denying anything had happened knowing how we both felt about honesty (coz that must've taken some guts to do). More than anything though, i didn't want to get overly upset in front of her and make her get upset and dump me for whatever reason, coz i really don't want to lose her.

So it wasn't her fault, she's confessed everything and felt really bad about it and not telling me, everything seems fine between us again already... but i can't help thinking, did i do the right thing or am i just being a doormat? Was forgiving her so absolutely and quickly a good idea? :(

I don't know your gf or Bob and it isn't my place to judge them, though all the same, I doubt she is being completely candid with you.

...I doubt she is being completely candid with you.I had considered that. I'm inclined to believe her though. She has a habit of flirting without realising it, and i've been out around town having a few drinks with her and a selection of friends enough times to know that she'll lead a whole bunch of me on without realising it and then refuse to believe that she did anything she shouldn't have, coz to her it's just laughing, smiling, joking... and if a guy asks for her number then it'd be rude to say "no" coz that'd be like saying "no coz i don't want you to call me coz i don't like you", wouldn't it? *genuinely innocent look* It's something i've learned to live with, but i can easily see her leading Bob on and then sleeping in his bed, then Bob being convinced he's in with a chance. :hmm:

How much of a clue does Bob's girlfriend have about all of this?

Am i a doormat?

Yes.

I had considered that. I'm inclined to believe her though. She has a habit of flirting without realising it, and i've been out around town having a few drinks with her and a selection of friends enough times to know that she'll lead a whole bunch of me on without realising it and then refuse to believe that she did anything she shouldn't have, coz to her it's just laughing, smiling, joking... and if a guy asks for her number then it'd be rude to say "no" coz that'd be like saying "no coz i don't want you to call me coz i don't like you", wouldn't it? *genuinely innocent look* It's something i've learned to live with, but i can easily see her leading Bob on and then sleeping in his bed, then Bob being convinced he's in with a chance. :hmm:

It's one thing to casually flirt, and yet another to casually sleep with someone. In all honesty, I don't know anyone-either sex- that casual sleeps with anyone unless it's friends with benefits, you know.

It's one thing to casually flirt, and yet another to casually sleep with someone. In all honesty, I don't know anyone-either sex- that casual sleeps with anyone unless it's friends with benefits, you know.

Yes.

:nice:
Samson

Yes, you are a doormat.

I also think your GF is not telling you the complete story. Does Bob have the only bed at her university? Can she not acquire her own separate place to sleep? I don't believe for one minute that she is sleeping in the same bed as this guy and not doing him.

It's one thing to casually flirt, and yet another to casually sleep with someone. In all honesty, I don't know anyone-either sex- that casual sleeps with anyone unless it's friends with benefits, you know.

Ive slept in beds with my male friends and it didnt mean anything but a place to crash.

That said, if she wasnt up front and honest about everything right from the start, Id be inclined to say she still wasnt being honest. So yes, I think you are being a doormat.

I think the larger point is that this situation isn't uncommon.

You are both very young and maybe what the two of you need to discuss is letting each other have some breathing room while you are still young adults. If it's a solid relationship with something to offer both ways, it will hold up until you guyz live in the same area again.

From reading your first post, I think it sounds promising over the long run. Don't sweat the small stuff.

Ive slept in beds with my male friends and it didnt mean anything but a place to crash.
Yes, but I assume your guy knows and trusts these male friends, right?

This situation would be absolutely unacceptable to me.

Yes, you are behaving like a doormat.

Dump her.

Yes, but I assume your guy knows and trusts these male friends, right?


Of course, Id never shack up with some random guy I just met and risk ruining the last 5 years of my life, his life and everything we've worked for.

So, i didn't get upset at all, coz she hadn't really done anything wrong ...
You mean like sleeping in a bed with another man even after he tried multiple times to get her to give it up? Or do you mean how she didn't tell you the whole story the first time? Nah, nothing wrong with that. :|

I wish I had a wife as understanding as you. :)

I agree with the others; you're a doormat. :(

Do you have welcome stamped across you're forehead? I think just the fact that she didn't come clean months ago is an indicator that there's more going on.

My girlfriend's a year (and a half) older than me, so while i'm still stuck in Suffolk in my last year before university she's already off 3-5 hours/ £30 train journey away in Kent.

She's calmed down a bit now, but during her first week (or "freshers week" even) she drunk an awful lot more and she felt very lonely and avoided sleeping in her own room for ages. She'd made a lot of new friends (bless her, she was so worried she wouldn't) and one of these was a guy who we'll call Bob.

My girlfriend slept at Bobs house for most of her first week, in his bed. Now, me and my girlfriend have this thing about honesty; we're both completely honest with each other, no lies or significant secrets. She told me what happened. She slept in his bed, he slept in the bed too (after asking if he could move from the floor and she felt it would rude to say he couldn't sleep in his own bed. They didn't hug/cuddle, but coz the bed wasn't huge they were pretty close. She also said Bob tried to kiss her once but she stopped him, and she thought he was just confused due to sleepiness/alcohol as Bob does have a girlfriend. I asked her if there was anything else i should know about and she said no, so i left it at that. I was a little anxious but had no ill feelings towards her (though i had a few towards Bob).

Now, a few months on, i have only just been told by her that actually he also tried to remove her underwear a few times late at night, but claimed he didn't remember anything in the morning, and that once he'd tried to *coughcough* "touch her intimately" (as i'm not sure what i can say outside of the everything forum) but she'd stopped him. She's only just told me this last night, despite how we're always honest and i'd asked her if anything else had happened. Apparently she'd felt really bad about it, and considered telling me, but people she'd spoken to about it said not to tell me coz it would only upset me. I asked her if she'd have told me if they hadn't said not to and she said yes.

So, i didn't get upset at all, coz she hadn't really done anything wrong, it was all Bob (who've i have actually met and he seems an alright sort of bloke when his hormones are in check, and besides, i can kinda sympathise with him; "hot girl in my bed, ery touchable, whoo!"), and i also admired that she'd told me this even after denying anything had happened knowing how we both felt about honesty (coz that must've taken some guts to do). More than anything though, i didn't want to get overly upset in front of her and make her get upset and dump me for whatever reason, coz i really don't want to lose her.

So it wasn't her fault, she's confessed everything and felt really bad about it and not telling me, everything seems fine between us again already... but i can't help thinking, did i do the right thing or am i just being a doormat? Was forgiving her so absolutely and quickly a good idea? :(


Not only are you a doormat, but she's wiping her dirty feet all over you.

1. If you can't show your true emotions in front of her without losing her (short of getting violent) there's a problem.

2. Sorry, but IMO it's more rude to have a guy sleep in the same bed as me who isn't my bf than to have the guy sleep on the floor. Especially if my bf doesn't know the guy.

3. You understand why this guy would disrespect you by touching your gf, and also disrespecting his gf??? Um, no. Don't care how hot the person is, when you're with someone you keep your hands to yourself.



Dump her. Seriously.

I agree with BB.
She is playing you for the fool.
Dump her before she gives you an STD.

Let's see... she flirts with other guys right in front of you, she GIVES OUT HER NUMBER to other guys right in front of you, she sleeps in some other guy's bed while she's away at school... and you have to ask whether or not you're a doormat?

You might as well just chop your balls off, because obviously you're not using them for anything.

Yes, you are behaving like a doormat.

Dump her.

what xach said :nice:

Eep! Much postings in my absence.

How much of a clue does Bob's girlfriend have about all of this?He's told her everything up to the part about him trying to finger her.

Does Bob have the only bed at her university? Can she not acquire her own separate place to sleep?She had her own room but at the other end of campus, no one wants her to walk that far in the dark, plus she hated sleeping in her room alone for the first week, she's got used to it now though.
I don't believe for one minute that she is sleeping in the same bed as this guy and not doing him.I think i can. She's really not the sort to do that, especially as she'd only just met him.

...if she wasnt up front and honest about everything right from the start, Id be inclined to say she still wasnt being honest.But then why tell me now? If i was completely unaware and unsuspecting then why tell me at all? That's why i suspect she was just feeling bad about keeping it secret and had to tell me to unburden the guilt or something.

You are both very young and maybe what the two of you need to discuss is letting each other have some breathing room while you are still young adults. If it's a solid relationship with something to offer both ways, it will hold up until you guyz live in the same area again.

From reading your first post, I think it sounds promising over the long run. Don't sweat the small stuff.Thanks. :) Originally we were planning to break up when she went to uni, but then we realised neither of us wanted that. Since then we've discussed wether it would be a good idea twice, and still neither of us want to. I'm feeling pretty confident this will last through uni, it's just i wasn't sure if not making a fuss about this situation will give her wrong idea or something.

If you can't show your true emotions in front of her without losing her (short of getting violent) there's a problem.I could have, she was certainly expecting that and would've been prepared for it, but i really didn't want to go through all the hassle. I wouldn't have gotten violent, just overly emotional knowing me. You understand why this guy would disrespect you by touching your gf, and also disrespecting his gf??? Um, no. Don't care how hot the person is, when you're with someone you keep your hands to yourself.When he wasn't thinking straight, due to high levels of alcohol and extreme sleepiness. Apparently, the time that he tried to kiss her, he said his girlfriends name not hers. I'm not saying what he did was right, or that i don't mind, just saying i can kinda understand how it could happen. Removing her underwear is completely different though; he tried 3 times, and each time he "didn't remember a thing" in the morning.

Dump her before she gives you an STD. As i've said, i really don't think she's the type to do that, not while she's still with me. I trust her enough to know that i guess. Besides, safe sex for the win.

Let's see... she flirts with other guys right in front of you, she GIVES OUT HER NUMBER to other guys right in front of you...But she honestly doesn't know that she's flirting. I don't know why but she doesn't understand how people think, she's completely nieve. She honestly thinks that a guy asking for her number just wants to be friends and keep in contact.

I still stand by what I said.


You seem like a nice guy. You deserve better.

Dude...

I still stand by what I said.


You seem like a nice guy. You deserve better.Thanks, but i can't find any better, if you want to think of it like that. No one comes close to her. Yeah, i'm just some teenage guy in love (and a little fat and tipsy by now given i'm about 2 hours into my beer and ice-cream binge) but there's no one else i can talk to like her, no one that understands me as well as her. Plus, naturally as i'm in love, i think she's the most beautiful girl i've ever met. Maybe i don't tell her this enough. *signs onto msn*

Alright dude, if you're intent on keeping your current position as Captain Oblivious, then go right ahead, but if you're going to ask for advice and/or opinions, heed our warnings.

It's definitely been interesting to see how many people said "dump her" compared to how many said "stay with her"... :hmm:

I guess i was more asking for opinions than advice, i'm fully aware that i can't dump her yet, if ever, i was just curious whether anyone else at all thought i was doing the right thing in not dumping her asap. Apparently not. I'm probably just insecure enough that i don't want to end things coz i'm convinced a guy like me will never get another girl as good as her. Then again, from what i've said about her on her she doesn't sound too good! But meh, i guess if i'd wanted informed opinions i should've asked people that know her. Nevermind. :|

Feel free to attribute this thread to me being a noob still. Or just an idiot, if you prefer. :rolleyes:

Try moving the relationship into a 'friendship and waiting' level and then wait until you get to the same university to move it back.

Thanks, but i can't find any better,

oh boy if I had a nickel for every time I heard that .... :hmm:

Try moving the relationship into a 'friendship and waiting' level and then wait until you get to the same university to move it back.No can do, i'm going to a different uni, hopefully Thames Valley in london, but if i don't get into that one then i'll be even further away, and i'm not keen on waiting 5 years, especially while i can afford the occasional train ticket, or just hitch a ride with her parents who visit her every now and then.

Well, I wish you luck, but traditionally that kind of time and distance doesn't hold up well.

i'm fully aware that i can't dump her yet, if ever

Why exactly is this? You're a 17-year-old kid with nowhere to go but up.

I used to be there, dude. Pretty much right there, 'cept that my girlfriend at the time was still in high school (not the same school, thankfully). Trust me, you're going to be much better off in the long run.

Is this your first serious relationship?

oh boy if I had a nickel for every time I heard that .... :hmm:

Or thought it and I bitch slapped you??? :rolleyes: Or when I used to say it about Ruttle? :confused:

Listen man, I can totally empathize with you here. When I met my husband, I made sure he was very much aware that I have men friends. Who are just friends. I even had such a friend take me to Vegas, pay for me the whole way, and we were JUST FRIENDS! (His Qualcomm stock went up in '99 and we bet if it hit a certain price we were going , so we did! No male believes me that nothing happened, at all. :rolleyes: )
Point being, women are allowed to have male friends. Although not many men want women friends, its just not 'normal'. I've got some friends who are like brothers to me, and like Rayney, would sleep in a bed with them without a second thought.

BUT - at the same time, she's young, and you two are in college..... I think its wonderful that you have such honesty. And I can see her freaking out not telling you of his attempts.... whether anything really happened? I don't know.. you need to trust her there. But just remember your age, and that things change so quickly. Just know we're here if you need to talk! :nice:

Omc, there are a few fundamental truths about LIFE that you need to get through your head.

First of all, she's a cheater. She always has been a cheater and she always will be a cheater. What's more, she's a liar. She has you totally convinced that she doesn't know that giving out her phone number and sleeping with other men is wrong. What is she? Brain-damaged? Because that's the only way she could think that. She's not stupid. She knows that she's mistreating you. But she also knows she can get away with it, because you're not gonna do jack squat about it. So why stop?

Second, you can and you will do better. If you can snag one hot girl, you can always snag another one. It might take some time, but you can do it if you put your mind to it. Girls are people just like you are, and there will always be millions of them out there. It's just a matter of finding a good one.

Third, you can dump her whenever you want. Every passing moment is another missed opportunity.

Fourth, and perhaps most importantly, you can never be happy with someone else until you can be happy by yourself. You don't need a relationship to survive. You don't have to put up with this abuse, and there's no good reason for you to do it. Take a look around at all the people you know who are single. Are they all miserable? No. They don't need anyone else's approval to he happy. So what makes you think you need it?

Five easy steps to salvation:

1. Break up with her.
2. Go home.
3. Cry.
4. Write some bad poetry.
5. GET OVER IT.

Well, I wish you luck, but traditionally that kind of time and distance doesn't hold up well.I know, but i also know that sometimes it does work out (and have seen mulitple examples where it has).

Why exactly is this? You're a 17-year-old kid with nowhere to go but up ... Is this your first serious relationship?Emotional attachment? I suppose i worded it badly; i could dump her, but i don't want to yet. If much more happens though, i might have to consider it. *shrugs* It's probably my second serious relationship, but it's so much more serious that i question if the first one was actually serious, if that makes sense. Yes, i know, i'm young and inexperienced. Meh. *waves hands dismissively*

I think its wonderful that you have such honesty. And I can see her freaking out not telling you of his attempts.... whether anything really happened? I don't know.. you need to trust her there. But just remember your age, and that things change so quickly.I trust her at the moment, i'm aware i may well be making a mistake, but at the moment i do. I'm aware things change, and if they do then so will my actions.

Omc, there are a few fundamental truths about LIFE that you need to get through your head.*sits up and pays attention*[/quote]First of all, she's a cheater. She always has been a cheater and she always will be a cheater. What's more, she's a liar. She has you totally convinced that she doesn't know that giving out her phone number and sleeping with other men is wrong. What is she? Brain-damaged? Because that's the only way she could think that. She's not stupid. She knows that she's mistreating you. But she also knows she can get away with it, because you're not gonna do jack squat about it. So why stop?[/quote]First of all, she's not always been a cheater, she's never cheated before on any of her boyfriends and i'm i trust her (for now) that she hasn't now on me. Much as i hate to admit it, she is pretty stupid, in a common sense kind of way, (the number of times i've had to stop her sticking forks in the toaster while it's still plugged in is quite alarming), especially once she'd had even a very small drink, i'm sure she'd quite happily accept candy from a stranger and then get a lift in his car after a few more drinks. She doesn't know what constitutes as flirting, and none of us can really explain accurately what it is she's doing that make her so flirtatious, and i really do believe her. She's aware that she keeps getting into these situations and that it's not fair on me so she's trying to take steps to avoid them, which is why i don't want to dump her yet, i feel i should give her at least one more chance.

Second, you can and you will do better. If you can snag one hot girl, you can always snag another one. It might take some time, but you can do it if you put your mind to it. Girls are people just like you are, and there will always be millions of them out there. It's just a matter of finding a good one.I'm willing to admit that i'm "blinded by love" as they say, and that while i may think she's better than anyone else i'll find i'm probably oh so very wrong. However, i'm quite happy to stay with my girlfriend for now, even if only til i wake up and find someone better than her i suppose. :hmm:

Third, you can dump her whenever you want. Every passing moment is another missed opportunity.On the other hand, if i dumped her, then every moment would be a missed opportunity to be with her for a while longer.

Fourth, and perhaps most importantly, you can never be happy with someone else until you can be happy by yourself. You don't need a relationship to survive. You don't have to put up with this abuse, and there's no good reason for you to do it. Take a look around at all the people you know who are single. Are they all miserable? No. They don't need anyone else's approval to he happy. So what makes you think you need it?Oh, don't get me wrong, i'm very happy by myself, which is possibly why i'm coping with being apart from her so much better than she is. I'm completely happy with myself, so much so that i don't just not need a girlfriend, i'd be quite happy without friends. Yes, i wouldn't mind being some kind of loner/isolationist/twat getting on with my life without anyone else bothering me at all. However, if i enjoy someones company then i don't see why i should continue to enjoy it, and i can ignore a minor hiccup along the way quite easily. Coz it's only really i minor hiccup in terms of my whole life, and in a similar way there's every possibility this whole relationship may well turn out to be very minor detail in my life, but while it's here and i'm enjoying i intend to stick with her. If it ends, well, such is life, there'll always be chocolate and ice-cream. :nice:

In summary, i'm young, foolish, and happy (very happy; now about 6 hours into the beer and ice-cream binge). You don't know me or her so can't really judge 100% accurately, but your opinions and thoughts are most interesting and i enjoy reading them. :)

Wow, this is the first forum i've been on with a multi-quote function, it's pretty damn useful!

oh boy if I had a nickel for every time I heard that ....
You'd be a nickleaire? :|

But then why tell me now? If i was completely unaware and unsuspecting then why tell me at all? That's why i suspect she was just feeling bad about keeping it secret and had to tell me to unburden the guilt or something.


Because shes guilty as sin thats why! Her conscience was getting to her, why hide it for x amount of time if she had nothing to hide?

Honestly, Id say it was only a matter of time until she ****s someone else, if she hasnt already.

You'd be a nickleaire? :|
:| yeah

On the other hand, if i dumped her, then every moment would be a missed opportunity to be with her for a while longer.

and on the other hand, she could very easily find someone else and dump you..

I went to college (or university as you foreigners call it) for five years, and saw five fresh crops of freshmen come in. from among the girls who came to school and had a boyfriend back home, 99% of them dumped him and started hooking up with guys at school. usually not in that order.

you see, for all the talk you hear about soul-mates and neverending love, convenience is still a very major factor in any relationship. if she never sees you, and she's always surrounded by available guys, it's only a matter of time before she moves on. the same goes for you. when you go away to school, and you're always surrounded by available girls, it wil only be a matter of time before you start thinking that you could find a better one. and you will.

but, of course, my opinions are just that: my opinions. they're based on the experiences i've had in my life. i don't know you or your girl, so i could be wrong. but i still think i'm right.

I agree with Feenix 100% !!!!

The sadness of all of this, my friends, is that he is on the defense. He will not see her for the person that she is, and the fool she is playing him for, until she is either caught red handed, or she dumps him for another guy.
He has not experienced this type of woman yet. I was this type of woman when I was younger. I hurt quite a few men. They never suspected it. Always thought I was the innocent, naive and unknowingly flirtatious girl that needed a good man to save her... what i needed (and got) was a swift kick of reality. I know I would never be that way again, but I can tell you now that this man is not going to be the one to change her. He's already under her spell. Poor guy.

Honestly, Id say it was only a matter of time until she ****s someone else, if she hasnt already.

Which she probably has, or at the very least wants to.

dude, you're with a girl who doesn't treat you right.

take a look in the mirror: you're asking a message board if you are a doormat when you know the answer to that yourself.

General rule: if you have to ask if you're a doormat, you're probably a doormat.

I'd say you're in a bad situation. For starters this long distance stuff seldom works. Regardless of what Disney and Hollywood like to tell us, this true love stuff is quite bogus. First thing you need to realize is that there are plenty of other women out there, some better suited for you than others. Yes, some even better than what you currently have. Let me tell you an old Polynesian saying, "Standing on the whale fishing for a minnow." What that means is that you are essentially standing on a wealth of opportunities but you are only trying for a miniscule fraction of them.

From what you say, you are behaving like a doormat. Your girlfriend is sleeping in the bed of another man. That in and of itself may not be a bad thing, however what is bad is that this guy has supposedly made several passes at her and she continues to stay over there. I would say that he is seducing her and she is rather enjoying it.

This puts you in a dilemma. You want to trust her, but essentially you are given no reason to. I am reminded of the great quote from William Shakespeare's The Merchant of Venice, "None but that ugly treason of mistrust, which makes me fear the enjoyment of my love." Truthfully you really have nothing to gain from this relationship from what you tell us. Lonely people often do regrettable things. It isn't any fault of yours, but from a strictly scientific perspective you cannot be expected to keep her hormones in your favor when you have no chance of exciting them through physical contact and being in the proximity in general. To put it more poetically, the male canary cannot attract the female if she isn’t around to hear his song.

I say see what other people have to offer. No bond can be severed without pain, but from what you describe this is a recipe for disaster. Don’t let your emotions get the best of you.

She's calmed down a bit now, but during her first week (or "freshers week" even) she drunk an awful lot more and she felt very lonely and avoided sleeping in her own room for ages. She'd made a lot of new friends (bless her, she was so worried she wouldn't) and one of these was a guy who we'll call Bob.

I would be surprised if she wasnt cheating on you. "drank an awful lot" and "felt very lonely" and "avoided sleeping in her own room for ages?" I dont know how it works in GB, but around here that would be a dead giveaway of shenanigans.

The distance also increases the liklihood of her cheating on you as does the fact that you're younger and not in college.

I think the reason she told you about bob at this point is to release some of the guilt that had built up.

Doormat? Possibly, but a little confidence can easily fix that. Letting your girlfriend sleep w/ another guy is simply absurd! I would sooner **** my sister than allow that! Listen, break up w/ the broad - you'll be better off.

Okay, I'm not gonna read the whole thread, but my first instinct is to say, yeah, if you have to ask, "am I a doormat?". then, yeah, you probably are.

And why might that be? What is it about you that might give some man, (it is some man, right?), the impression that you might be fooled, once again, by his perdifidy? Can you not jump up and say, "not this time, man'?.....Or do I just not "understand" him? Do I just not, "get it'?

Do I just not understand how he really means to be better with you, (even though he pounds the **** out of you.)


Crap! This isn't fair to you; I'm laying some of my personal crap on you; not, of course that I don't stand by what I said; I'm right, aren't I?

The originator of this thread is male.

The originator of this thread is male.


Oh! I'm sorry; that might have saved some time; YES, you are a doormat.

Was there something else that you were wondering about?


(because I suspect that the doormat issue was a non-issue, yeah?)

Eep! Much postings in my absence.

He's told her everything up to the part about him trying to finger her.

.

That reminds me: gotta clip nails today........:hmm:

If you have to ask if you are a doormat obviously you feel like you are.