As a parent, please tell me your thoughts on this.

This woman who worked for my dad has a teen daughter. She’s 14 years old, really cute, cheer leader, etc. She meets this guy that she’s totally into. She’s had the occasional boyfriend before. You know, the puppy love. But she’s never really gone out with a guy. So she’s really digging this guy right? Guess what? Mr. Perfect is almost 18 years old.

Lets think about this. Yes, that’s only 4 years. But take into consideration the emotional and maturity level in a 14 year old girl opposed to an 18 year old man. There’s a huge gap there. It doesn’t help that this girl is very immature for her age.

Well, mom and dad have a problem with this. Their daughter begs and pleads to let her go out with this guy, she LOVES him!!! They HAVE to let her, or her whole life will be ruined!!! :rolleyes: So they agree.

What they don’t tell their daughter, or the man they agreed to let her date is that they know they’re having sex (they found out after they gave the okay) and once he turns 18 they are going to press charges against him. They KNOW that if found guilty he will be charged as a sex offender and it will ruin his whole life.

They’re NOT doing this to get back at him. Remember, they said it was okay for them to date. Their reasoning behind this is to teach their daughter a lesson.

That’s some bull **** if I ever heard it. I feel like calling up the poor kid and warning him. Of course, he won’t believe me.

As a parent, would you ever even consider doing this??? Ruining someone else’s life to teach your daughter a lesson?

I think it’s very irresponsible parenting, and couldn’t imagine being insane enough to do something like that.

Ok as a parent I will answer like this. No I would not let my 14 year old daughter date a 18 year old man to start with. The maturity level is the key there. And I think its kind of ****ty for the parents to press charges on the 18 year old when they willingly let them go out.

My daughter will be allowed to date at the age of 30, but only with good behaviour. :|

I don't agree with him dating a 14 year old, but I think you should call him and warn him anyway.

Giving your daughter a lesson is no excuse for ruining someone's life. For them to give permission and then turn it around and destroy his life is just plain wrong. Worse than him dating a 14 year old IMO.

They're @ssholes. If she turns up pregnant they'll have another issue to deal with on top of their stupidity. They'll probably blame the guy instead of themselves for allowing it in the first place.

I just cannot understand how any parent could knowingly allow this to happen.

that isnt cool... you can go out with him, but we will trick him and let him become a statutory rapist. Stuff like that can really f*ck up somebody's life. How could they justify that sort of action?

You SHOULD tell her that her parents are going to trick her. How can her parents prove that they are sexually active btw?

They are going to teach her a lesson, .... dont they realize that they will end up betraying her and she will learn a lesson that they didnt intend.

parents:)

I see examples of bad parenting everyday.

This is appalling. Personally I don't really have a problem with their age difference, I do have a problem with how the parents are handling it. I can't understand why they think being malicious is going to somehow help their daughter in the long run.

I used to hang out with older guys a lot when I was a teen - not unusal at all for me to see guys age 21-22 when I was 15-16. But, we would just hang out - go to movies, the beach, etc. Nothing they could get prosecuted for.

This one of the reasons why I probably won't have kids. I wouldn't have the patience to deal with my childs patners parents if they happen to be nutjobs. And most parents lately seem to be just that....

Id make it VERY clear they are not to date - to BOTH of them. If I were to find out they were having sex anyway, I would most definately charge him/her with stat rape. 100%.

That is horrible. They should never have let her date him in the first place. Now charge him with rape? I would warn the kid. He may not listen but at least he will have had a warning.

Charge the parents with contributing to the delinquency of a minor or some form of neglect or child endangerment since they allowed the "acts" to happen and encouraged it.

That whole scenario is just wrong :nonono: their first mistake was giving into her and letting them date, if they were that against it they should've stuck to their guns and said no (although she probably would have found a way to see him anyway). Having a charge like that on his record is like a death sentence :nonono: I don't think they fully understand the repercussions of a charge like that....especially when they approved it in the first place...that sort of betrayal is just wrong...their daughter will never trust them again..so in addition to ruining this guy's life, they will have also destroyed their relationship with their daughter.. :nonono:

I don't see why everyone has such a problem with the age difference in the first place.

That's pretty sick...

Actually if I was that 18 y/o guy and this **** happened to me... well.. let's just say I'd make sure I was going to jail for a reason. *click click*

I don't see why everyone has such a problem with the age difference in the first place.

/agree


14... 18... That's what, a senior going out with a freshman in High School... Plenty of that happened in my school... and I definately don't think some kids life should get ruined over it.

In my opinion if the guy goes to jail, the parents should also go to jail, because they know it's going on and are doing nothing to prevent it. Which makes them just as liable if not more so. Basically, they are letting someone rape their little girl to prove a point. This girl is going to grow up resenting and hating her parents, or slitting her wrists. Good job parents.

Can they do that? charge him later, for something he did at the age of 17?

Can they do that? charge him later, for something he did at the age of 17?
I don't think so. It seems to me that's why they're keeping quiet until he turns 18 so they will have sex when he's 18 and THEN they can press charges. That's how I read it anyway.

Tell the kid to stop having sex with her before he turns 18. Seriously.

Tell the kid to stop having sex with her before he turns 18. Seriously.

/agree

Ok as a parent I will answer like this. No I would not let my 14 year old daughter date a 18 year old man to start with. The maturity level is the key there. And I think its kind of ****ty for the parents to press charges on the 18 year old when they willingly let them go out.
Yeah, me too. :( It was a factor in my dad giving her the boot, it really pissed him off when she started talking about how she was going to teach her daughter a lesson at this kids expense.

My daughter will be allowed to date at the age of 30, but only with good behaviour. :|
All dads say that, but in the end you give in. Your little girl will probably be going on her first date at 13. ;)

I don't agree with him dating a 14 year old, but I think you should call him and warn him anyway.

Giving your daughter a lesson is no excuse for ruining someone's life. For them to give permission and then turn it around and destroy his life is just plain wrong. Worse than him dating a 14 year old IMO.

It's worse IMO too. I can't call him. I have no idea who he is. :shrug: I'm just hearing all this second hand. My step mom was telling me about it, and the woman who's daughter this is no longer works for us. I wish I could though, it just makes me sick that someone could do that to another person. :(

They're @ssholes. If she turns up pregnant they'll have another issue to deal with on top of their stupidity. They'll probably blame the guy instead of themselves for allowing it in the first place.

I just cannot understand how any parent could knowingly allow this to happen.
Neither can I. :( They are ass holes. I think this woman is insane, no joke. She's the same person that demanded that her daughter have no male teachers at the public school she attends, because a teacher that used to work there years ago just got exposed as a rapist. :hmm: Not all male teachers are like that, that one really got my blood boiling. That's just so rude and disrespectful. Lumping all male teachers are rapists is ... grrr. :mad:

that isnt cool... you can go out with him, but we will trick him and let him become a statutory rapist. Stuff like that can really f*ck up somebody's life. How could they justify that sort of action?

You SHOULD tell her that her parents are going to trick her. How can her parents prove that they are sexually active btw?

They are going to teach her a lesson, .... dont they realize that they will end up betraying her and she will learn a lesson that they didnt intend.

I have no idea how they would prove it. How does anybody's parents that charge their gf's boyfriend with rape prove it? :shrug:
parents:)
:P
I see examples of bad parenting everyday.
Me too.
This is appalling. Personally I don't really have a problem with their age difference, I do have a problem with how the parents are handling it. I can't understand why they think being malicious is going to somehow help their daughter in the long run.

I used to hang out with older guys a lot when I was a teen - not unusal at all for me to see guys age 21-22 when I was 15-16. But, we would just hang out - go to movies, the beach, etc. Nothing they could get prosecuted for.

Yes yes, but this girl... if you didn't know her age you'd swear she's 11 years old. I met her once and didn't even realize that she was this womans oldest daughter, I assumed she was the younger one who's 11... :hmm: She just has that really immature personaility, which isn't a bad thing, but she shouldn't be going out with someone that's so much more mature then she is...

This one of the reasons why I probably won't have kids. I wouldn't have the patience to deal with my childs patners parents if they happen to be nutjobs. And most parents lately seem to be just that....
Not all parents are horrible. It's just the ones that are stand out more.
Id make it VERY clear they are not to date - to BOTH of them. If I were to find out they were having sex anyway, I would most definately charge him/her with stat rape. 100%.
Why? Even if your daughter gave her consent? It's just as much her fault as his. :P
That is horrible. They should never have let her date him in the first place. Now charge him with rape? I would warn the kid. He may not listen but at least he will have had a warning.
I honestly would if I knew how to contact him. I haven't even seen this girl's mom in a week. My parents were talking about this yesterday that's what made me think to post it.
Poor kid... :(
Charge the parents with contributing to the delinquency of a minor or some form of neglect or child endangerment since they allowed the "acts" to happen and encouraged it.
:nice: I agree.
That whole scenario is just wrong :nonono: their first mistake was giving into her and letting them date, if they were that against it they should've stuck to their guns and said no (although she probably would have found a way to see him anyway). Having a charge like that on his record is like a death sentence :nonono: I don't think they fully understand the repercussions of a charge like that....especially when they approved it in the first place...that sort of betrayal is just wrong...their daughter will never trust them again..so in addition to ruining this guy's life, they will have also destroyed their relationship with their daughter.. :nonono:
They are fully aware that they are going to ruin this guy's life. :( They're like that, they don't give a ****. It's so stupid.. I am SO glad I don't have parents like that. Granted, we have our own set of problems but that's another topic. :P
I don't see why everyone has such a problem with the age difference in the first place.
I do.
That's pretty sick...

Actually if I was that 18 y/o guy and this **** happened to me... well.. let's just say I'd make sure I was going to jail for a reason. *click click*
You couldn't do it. :|
/agree


14... 18... That's what, a senior going out with a freshman in High School... Plenty of that happened in my school... and I definately don't think some kids life should get ruined over it.

In my opinion if the guy goes to jail, the parents should also go to jail, because they know it's going on and are doing nothing to prevent it. Which makes them just as liable if not more so. Basically, they are letting someone rape their little girl to prove a point. This girl is going to grow up resenting and hating her parents, or slitting her wrists. Good job parents.
She probably resents them already. They have a very weird relationship with their kids.

Can they do that? charge him later, for something he did at the age of 17?

I don't think so. It seems to me that's why they're keeping quiet until he turns 18 so they will have sex when he's 18 and THEN they can press charges. That's how I read it anyway.

Yep, igo is correct.

Thats just WRONG. :nonono:

He probably won't get charged, though. If the girl refuses to testify, then they have no proof, unless the guy admits it. :shrug:

All dads say that, but in the end you give in. Your little girl will probably be going on her first date at 13. ;).
:yikes:

:barf: :barf: :barf:

As a parent, please tell me your thoughts on this.

This woman who worked for my dad has a teen daughter. She’s 14 years old, really cute, cheer leader, etc. She meets this guy that she’s totally into. She’s had the occasional boyfriend before. You know, the puppy love. But she’s never really gone out with a guy. So she’s really digging this guy right? Guess what? Mr. Perfect is almost 18 years old.

Lets think about this. Yes, that’s only 4 years. But take into consideration the emotional and maturity level in a 14 year old girl opposed to an 18 year old man. There’s a huge gap there. It doesn’t help that this girl is very immature for her age.

Well, mom and dad have a problem with this. Their daughter begs and pleads to let her go out with this guy, she LOVES him!!! They HAVE to let her, or her whole life will be ruined!!! :rolleyes: So they agree.

What they don’t tell their daughter, or the man they agreed to let her date is that they know they’re having sex (they found out after they gave the okay) and once he turns 18 they are going to press charges against him. They KNOW that if found guilty he will be charged as a sex offender and it will ruin his whole life.

They’re NOT doing this to get back at him. Remember, they said it was okay for them to date. Their reasoning behind this is to teach their daughter a lesson.

That’s some bull **** if I ever heard it. I feel like calling up the poor kid and warning him. Of course, he won’t believe me.

As a parent, would you ever even consider doing this??? Ruining someone else’s life to teach your daughter a lesson?

I think it’s very irresponsible parenting, and couldn’t imagine being insane enough to do something like that.
In most states, it's not a crime if he's under 20, and they're less than five years apart in age.

Unfortunately, it doesn't look like Indiana is one of those states:

IC 35-42-4-9
Sexual misconduct with a minor
Sec. 9. (a) A person at least eighteen (18) years of age who, with a child at least fourteen (14) years of age but less than sixteen (16) years of age, performs or submits to sexual intercourse or deviate sexual conduct commits sexual misconduct with a minor, a Class C felony. However, the offense is:
(1) a Class B felony if it is committed by a person at least twenty-one (21) years of age; and
(2) a Class A felony if it is committed by using or threatening the use of deadly force, if it is committed while armed with a deadly weapon, if it results in serious bodily injury, or if the commission of the offense is facilitated by furnishing the victim, without the victim's knowledge, with a drug (as defined in IC 16-42-19-2(1)) or a controlled substance (as defined in IC 35-48-1-9) or knowing that the victim was furnished with the drug or controlled substance without the victim's knowledge.
(b) A person at least eighteen (18) years of age who, with a child at least fourteen (14) years of age but less than sixteen (16) years of age, performs or submits to any fondling or touching, of either the child or the older person, with intent to arouse or to satisfy the sexual desires of either the child or the older person, commits sexual misconduct with a minor, a Class D felony. However, the offense is:
(1) a Class C felony if it is committed by a person at least twenty-one (21) years of age; and
(2) a Class B felony if it is committed by using or threatening the use of deadly force, while armed with a deadly weapon, or if the commission of the offense is facilitated by furnishing the victim, without the victim's knowledge, with a drug (as defined in IC 16-42-19-2(1)) or a controlled substance (as defined in IC 35-48-1-9) or knowing that the victim was furnished with the drug or controlled substance without the victim's knowledge.
(c) It is a defense that the accused person reasonably believed that the child was at least sixteen (16) years of age at the time of the conduct. However, this subsection does not apply to an offense described in subsection (a)(2) or (b)(2).
(d) It is a defense that the child is or has ever been married. However, this subsection does not apply to an offense described in subsection (a)(2) or (b)(2).
As added by P.L.79-1994, SEC.15. Amended by P.L.33-1996, SEC.9; P.L.216-1996, SEC.21; P.L.31-1998, SEC.8; P.L.266-2003, SEC.1.

Why? Even if your daughter gave her consent? It's just as much her fault as his. :P



For some reason, Im very militant about this and I dont know why :|

Even if she gave her consent, I would still try and have him charged - shes a minor and he is an adult (at least here he is) and should know better than to bang underage girls.

That said, once she hits 16 she can **** every sailor that comes into port - not that Id be thrilled, but hten its legal.

:| My children will be locked under the stairs until they are 16 I think.

I have no idea how they would prove it. How does anybody's parents that charge their gf's boyfriend with rape prove it? :shrug: .

Ema, speaking as the father of a daughter, "proof of BF's guilt" would be the last thing on my mind.............I'd have other priorities......e.g. which location would be most remote to most painfully remove parts of BF's body while remaining witnessless.

Parentally Irresponsible,
Samson

:yikes:

:barf: :barf: :barf:

It's true. :cooldance

I would have thought CP would be all in favor of the parents' strategy. Afterall, he favors the government throwing perfectly innocent gun owners in jail so that their rapes and murders will coerce other gun owners into giving up their weapons to the government. Why shouldn't a young man be sacrified in order to teach a teenager a lesson?

I would have thought Bo wouldn't want to derail a thread just to tick off a poster. We're all wrong sometimes.... :rolleyes:

I would have thought that Ema would have called the kid and warned him. This whole thread smells of troll to me. How does Ema know that this is what the parents intend to do? If she is really a friend of the girl, why hasn't she clued her in?

I call trolling. This is not a believable scenario any which way one slices and dices it.

As a parent, please tell me your thoughts on this.

This woman who worked for my dad has a teen daughter. She’s 14 years old, really cute, cheer leader, etc. She meets this guy that she’s totally into. She’s had the occasional boyfriend before. You know, the puppy love. But she’s never really gone out with a guy. So she’s really digging this guy right? Guess what? Mr. Perfect is almost 18 years old.

Lets think about this. Yes, that’s only 4 years. But take into consideration the emotional and maturity level in a 14 year old girl opposed to an 18 year old man. There’s a huge gap there. It doesn’t help that this girl is very immature for her age.

Well, mom and dad have a problem with this. Their daughter begs and pleads to let her go out with this guy, she LOVES him!!! They HAVE to let her, or her whole life will be ruined!!! :rolleyes: So they agree.

What they don’t tell their daughter, or the man they agreed to let her date is that they know they’re having sex (they found out after they gave the okay) and once he turns 18 they are going to press charges against him. They KNOW that if found guilty he will be charged as a sex offender and it will ruin his whole life.

They’re NOT doing this to get back at him. Remember, they said it was okay for them to date. Their reasoning behind this is to teach their daughter a lesson.

That’s some bull **** if I ever heard it. I feel like calling up the poor kid and warning him. Of course, he won’t believe me.

As a parent, would you ever even consider doing this??? Ruining someone else’s life to teach your daughter a lesson?

I think it’s very irresponsible parenting, and couldn’t imagine being insane enough to do something like that.
Where in this post does it say she's a friend of the girl?

Excuse me, I misspoke. Her dad knows the other girl's mom. The rest of my comments stand. It smells of troll.

Why are Ema's parents sitting still and allowing this boy to be set up for a lifetime criminal record? Why would the mom confess such a hideous plot to a co-worker?

The real world is not a Jerry Springer episode. This thread is a troll.

The real world is not a Jerry Springer episode.

No. Its much, much worse. :nice:

. WHo the hell am I trolling??? Why the hell would I want to do that?


Why are Ema's parents sitting still and allowing this boy to be set up for a lifetime criminal record? Why would the mom confess such a hideous plot to a co-worker?

What can they do??? She doesn't even work for us anymore.

And why did she tell this to my step mom? Because she had to explain why she was taking time out of her job to call people and search online for information about what she could do about this boy.

She also took time out of her job when she was making sure her daughter had no male teachers.

Why are you being so mean to me??? And please, do tell me how this is trolling?

I don't know what's going on in your life right now, but please don't take it out on me. I can understand that you might be going through something right now and you're just very upset, but it's not really fair to take that out on me.

I hope whatever's going on gets resolved. :)