Truth Teller
09-08-2005, 04:12 PM
[satire,based on fact]
Poor Republicans:
Wear NASCAR caps.
Drink cheap beer.
Have front teeth missing.
Wear old t-shirts and old jeans.
Read Right-Wing Christianity For Dummies.
Gets cheap tickets for Toby Keith concerts.
Thinks the London bombings present a good opportunity to invade Iran.
Wants a Supreme Court judge who is against abortion.
Are stupid enough to believe that Bush Administration policies will actually benefit them.
Dropped out of high school.
Pollutes nature with his obnoxious use of snow mobiles,jet skies and leaf- blowers.
Sees gays as a threat.
Lost job.
Justifies his postitions on issues with misguided interpetations of the Bible.
Still has a hankerin' for "Freedom Fries".
Voted for Bush while pumping his fist in the air and yelling "Woo-hoo!".
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Rich Republicans:
Drink only the most expsensive, imported liquor that money can buy.
Have perfect teeth due to the finest dental work that big money can buy.
Wear the finest suits made by the finest tailors that big money can buy.
Read The Wall Street Journal.
Spends over $3,000 for front row opera tickets.
Thinks the London bombings present a good opportunity to invest in companies that rebuild subway systems.
Wants a Supreme Court judge who is against holding corperations responsible for things like toxic waste spills.
Knowingly calculates how much Bush Adminstration policies benefit him....to the penny.
Dropped into high schools to privatize their lunch programs with his unhealthy fast food franchises.
Pollutes nature with his obnoxious leadership of multinational companies.
Sees gays as an untapped demographic to market to.
Outsourced jobs.
Justifies his positions on issues with misguided interpetations of the market.
Frequently flies to France......for lunch.
Voted for Bush while clutching his wallet and holding his nose.
Poor Republicans:
Wear NASCAR caps.
Drink cheap beer.
Have front teeth missing.
Wear old t-shirts and old jeans.
Read Right-Wing Christianity For Dummies.
Gets cheap tickets for Toby Keith concerts.
Thinks the London bombings present a good opportunity to invade Iran.
Wants a Supreme Court judge who is against abortion.
Are stupid enough to believe that Bush Administration policies will actually benefit them.
Dropped out of high school.
Pollutes nature with his obnoxious use of snow mobiles,jet skies and leaf- blowers.
Sees gays as a threat.
Lost job.
Justifies his postitions on issues with misguided interpetations of the Bible.
Still has a hankerin' for "Freedom Fries".
Voted for Bush while pumping his fist in the air and yelling "Woo-hoo!".
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Rich Republicans:
Drink only the most expsensive, imported liquor that money can buy.
Have perfect teeth due to the finest dental work that big money can buy.
Wear the finest suits made by the finest tailors that big money can buy.
Read The Wall Street Journal.
Spends over $3,000 for front row opera tickets.
Thinks the London bombings present a good opportunity to invest in companies that rebuild subway systems.
Wants a Supreme Court judge who is against holding corperations responsible for things like toxic waste spills.
Knowingly calculates how much Bush Adminstration policies benefit him....to the penny.
Dropped into high schools to privatize their lunch programs with his unhealthy fast food franchises.
Pollutes nature with his obnoxious leadership of multinational companies.
Sees gays as an untapped demographic to market to.
Outsourced jobs.
Justifies his positions on issues with misguided interpetations of the market.
Frequently flies to France......for lunch.
Voted for Bush while clutching his wallet and holding his nose.