ok here's the beef.. I meet this girl who is a friend of a friend a yada yada we start hanging out.. I liked her alot, but I could tell that I wasn't going to be inthrawled with love for her.. anyways, she tells me that she is pregnant from her xbf that she was living with.. and she is pregnant b/c he would have sex with her while she was sleeping.. which made me want to puke and kill the guy but anyways, she is only 18 with no job, no money, and no school.. she is going back and forth between living with her mom and dad.. she doesn't know what she is going to do when the baby is born.. she doesn't want to have an aboration, which I think is honerable, but she is considering adoption.. I am trying to make her feel better about this whole situation, but it ain't working..

and to make it better, the guy who she was dating, she really liked, and they were going to move in together and raise the kid.. he decides if she doesn't have an aboration it's over.. so yeah now she thinks all guys are *******s (which we are ok, but not that bad:D).. and she is torn about that too.. any advice?

advice on what YOU should do? dude, there isn't much you CAN do! i would think the only thing to do is keep offering support. unless you can find her a job or give her money, there isn't much you can do. but it depends on how much you want to help her, too.......

Originally posted by little_darkling
advice on what YOU should do? dude, there isn't much you CAN do! i would think the only thing to do is keep offering support. unless you can find her a job or give her money, there isn't much you can do. but it depends on how much you want to help her, too.......

I agree there isn't much i can do... but she asked for advice on making her feel better... and I tell her that the only person that can make her feel better is her.. and I guess she is the typical female because of this says, no that she needs a guy, pacifically the guy that won't date her.. and blah blah blah...

I just want to know what to tell her.. it feels like she is wanting me to give her advice and I can't..

Like I dunno maybe this is just me..But I really think I would know someone was having sex with me while I slept.

I really dont mean to be critical, but maybe she needs to quit putting the blame on others, I mean if this guy did this, The first step is to turn his ass in. Then if she wants to have this child. Get a job, take care of herself, and dont look for others to have symapthy and do this for her. This is really unfortunate, but it happened and it is time for her to make a decision.

Adoption is a good option, for woman unable to raise their child. Plenty of families out there, wanting a child they can love.
As far as your place in this. Be Weary, Be Very Weary.. Be the good guy you are. :) Good Luck~

me good guy??? phhhh.. whatever I am just trying to get some.. :) lol

yeah I doubted the whole sleeping thing.. but she is a small girl and he was a big guy.. but then again, if she didn't want it to happen she could of said no.. but anyways, she's pregnant and that's all that matters.. I just hope she don't look to me for money or anything, b/c I ain't supporting no mom and baby, esp. not my baby and the mom is too lazy to work.. not to be mean.. that's just the way it is, and the other guy already told her that..

she keeps saying I don't need a guy.. she maybe right, but I asked her if she decides to keep the kid, what about a kid.. he needs a male roll model.. I am not suggesting it be me.. (man that would be a f'd up kid:)lol) but he needs to know where his daddy is, which she said she would never let him know.. he lives in another state anyways..

I think that is another reason that she wasn't quite sleeping when they had sex, she doesn't like him, for obvious reasons.. anyways, kinda of a weird situation.. she is starting to get sick everyday, which makes it even harder for me to try to help her feel better about being herself.. but no one can do that but herself..

No, nobody REALLY can do that but her. All you can do is offer her a little suport & hope that helps. As for the kid needing a male role model, you are right on that. Adoption would probably be best for the kid because of that, but she has to make that choice as well, and it won't be an easy one. I know I'd have a hard time giving up my kid even if it likely meant a better life for them.

Anyway, if you want to help her, just give hr what support you reasonably can, but heed Heather's warning about being on guard as well. She may be trying to capture a substitute father to take her away from it all. Also, like my in-laws, she may just be the type that thrive on attention from all the drama in their life. Basicly an attention leech that only wants to whine & never really try to get things together.

Originally posted by Shadowhawk
Anyway, if you want to help her, just give hr what support you reasonably can, but heed Heather's warning about being on guard as well. She may be trying to capture a substitute father to take her away from it all. Also, like my in-laws, she may just be the type that thrive on attention from all the drama in their life. Basicly an attention leech that only wants to whine & never really try to get things together.

very VERY true. it just bothers me that she said something like she needs a man, the one that doens't want her..... now i'm not exactly a "polite" person so i would have told her to fetch some confidence in herself, get straight, give that guy what he deserves (RIGHT ON, Princess), and then get the pieces settled. if adoption is what she's gotta do, then adoption it is. what she needs is to stop thinking or worrying about NOW and put her feelings aside and sit with reality for a while and get the agenda set up.

not exactly nice to say, but....... well, just keep giving her support. though it virtually may not look like it's doing much, it'll help in the long run once this is all over. but watch your step with her, too, just like everyone else is saying.

well I still don't know what the deal is, like she wants to go hang out this weekend with me and the buddies.. I was like ok sure.. b/c her brother is one of the buddies.. but the part I don't get is.. she told me she wanted to start going to college, at the same college I am going to.. I was like ok cool, we can go to registration or what-not together, well she didn't go with me, and she never did go back, like she swore up and down like she was going to do, now she is going to have to beg for a class that they probably won't let her take..

sigh.. anyways, I don't think you have much to worry about me and her hooking up, she is a great friend and an awesome girl.. but as you can guess a bit too wild for me.. she said she doesn't date virgins.. so I guess I am out.. literally :)

whoa whoa whoa, she doesn't date virgins?! WTF is that??!! i've NEVER heard of a rule like that. that's some crazy shit.

Originally posted by little_darkling
whoa whoa whoa, she doesn't date virgins?! WTF is that??!! i've NEVER heard of a rule like that. that's some crazy shit.

what you date virgins? only reason she won't date me.. is she likes having sex, and she won't screw virgins b/c they remember the first time.. anyways, just looking for an excuse it looks to me like.. :rolleyes:

not that I am begging to date her anywho

She's too much trouble. She's a little girl with big problems, and that's playing on the heartstrings. Press the mute button and move along.

She won't date you because you're a virgin, huh? Well, tell her to take a nap for a few minutes, and you can solve that problem . . . :rolleyes: Oh brother . . .

"Hi, I want your help, money, and support and all . . . but you can FORGET any action . . ." I'd make a counter-offer of "well, I'll listen to you bitch an moan for an hour or so, but you have to blow me for about 20 minutes . . . and no spitting!"

Refer to any emotional tampon post. That's what she's wanting. You'll work until she can straighten up the guy she's living with . . .

lol.. actually I am not trying to get with her, we just won't get along.. she is a good friend of mine, and we get along great.. but I see no interest for both us..

btw.. durden.. good to see you around again.. you need to check out my member forum.. so you can give me a swift ass kicking.. :D lol

About time you got back to give the boy a good boot in the arse Dave:D

You missed his DA Online Journal though... LMAO!

I am sure he will make his way there now..

"thank you sir, can I have another?"

Originally posted by Wedge4876
I am sure he will make his way there now..

"thank you sir, can I have another?"


ROFLMAO! You wanted to apprentice yourself to the great one:D:D:D

You want me to kick you in the member???
:D

actually I prefer to call it "my unit"
:D

Mine's bigger than a single unit . . . LOL!

Originally posted by D Durden
Mine's bigger than a single unit . . . LOL!

... turn the page, move on.