Well this is actually for myself. I talk to myself. I don't care much for feedback but if you want, feel free. A lot of this stuff might sound arrogaunt. For me to think back and remeber what happened and how it happened. It's also for those who would like to gain a tad insight on what I did and how I think in particular situations. I'll edit PRN. Some things might seem mean but I don't want any smilies so you won't really know when how I really feel.

The Ride

Well I had to go on the bus today. I woke up @ 6 and got ready fast. I ended up seeing my aunt and bummed a ride to the station. Riding the bus sucks and I hope that changes soon. Well I got there and just waited. There were others there waiting, in the dark, like myself. Then I saw a car pull up. I took a quick glance and saw this amazing girl. But my senses were on high alert. I could tell she was a youngin'. Then when I saw her friend come out, I knew she was like freshman or sophmore. I caught myself before any eye business happened. I patted my back on that one. Funny thing is, I saw her eye me. Funny, really. I could tell she wanted me to look at her. I've had that type of body language thrown at me before. I kinda know what was happening but I thought to myself, "I'll have plenty of that in class". I seem to have the "weirdenisms" when I walk from class to class(I'll explain more). Well when we got on some 30 y.o. starts talking to her. I guess they know each other(from the bus I presume). Well she replies once and that's all. They guy, I thought, was making a fool out of himself. But whatever. It ends up, that she did get off near the highschool. Some people have no shame when they find out the age of a girl, but, I do. With younger ones I do. I hold a prejeduce. I guess it stems from HS when all the seniors took all the potential freshmans. Seems girls at that age are drawn to older men, so I vowed not me. Only someone who's close to my age or older.

Before first class

I got on DA. Pmed someone who didn't pm me back-it happens. I then went to the book store and thought there would be a long line. Afterall, it was the first day. Seems they had five registers open so there was no at all. Got my stuff and then headed off to STatistics. On the way there, I passed up "Janeth"--a 5'3 Filipina with light skin and braces. Extremely pretty. Not flamboyant or vibrant, just pretty. She worked at Jamba Juice(which rules and is where I got her name). Well she passed me up rather quickly. I think it was that she liked me at first and then gave me the middle finger with her body language. I've seen it before. Or, it was probably that she didn't expect to see me. I thought she was in HS actually. Could have been that she just wanted to avoid me. In any case we made eye contact, I kept cool and she just scrammed. huh*wonders* I thought for sures that this class would suck. It was statistics @ 9am.

Stats

You know when I was approaching my class, I thought, "Shoot. I struck out on this one." I thought that there would be no pretty grils to talk to. I'm just now realizing how shallow I am. Well, ends up I was wrong. There have been these two that I've seen since I've been here. It's funny b/c one of the was an ugly duckling in HS(I only attended for half a year). Then this!? Well, her friend (I think) is all about natural beauty. I've only seen one guy really talk to her. He was asian. They are in there. There was this one girl who not so pretty but I could tell she kiiiiiinda liked me. I think that I could ask her for some help and lean on that one. Ends up that a HS friends brother is in there too. That tripped me out. He's older though. I don't want to be like him; older and still going to a CC. There is also this one dummy that sits in the front. I can't stand him. I'll see how I cope with him. He seems like he'll be a pain. I also have "The SUV" girl. She is small but has a tight suv. She has a bf too. He tryed to stare me down and all. I guess he felt threatned. She was in my math class last semester. Then I saw this couple that was also in my math class. Hec, I didn't even know they were a couple. They never hold hand or kissed. So then I thought they were brother and sister. Eventually I found out that they were dating. She's really pretty. They are both filipino. He's cool. I actually copied his 3x5 for last semester's final. We got the same teacher for this class too. I'm happy that both of these two are in my class and that they passed. SUV girl used to give me the eye. haha Then we got out. It's like a stampede. But I managed to get out. It was then that I saw a girl who liked me all kinds. It was funny(I actually have a thread of her in the relationships forum) because she shunned me, but in a way that she still had feelings(I could tell). It was comedy though. I then headed off to my speech class.

Speech

This was fun. I saw a few people I know. There is this one guy, who I played football against(and won), from greenfield. For exactly a year he has never known my name until today. He always called me "Soledad". His name is Jerard. He's real cool. He was sad about the Raiders. Well I sat in the back b/c there were no more seats. Then I saw this pretty girl. So I offered her my seat. I felt this was a good opportunity to act smooth. So I did. She tryed to refuse but I insisted. She told me "how sweet". I know Zach would be proud of me. lol Others saw that too. Well then we were passing out syllabuses and me and this other pretty girl had to share. So I held it up. Wow, she mumbles worse than me. I tryed to get her to talk but no dice. Not now at least. I knew that by the end of the day we'd be talking. The teacher is cool. He had us do this cool exercise. We wondered around the class and then he told us to stop. We then had to talk with someone, that we didn't know, and introduce ourselves. I think I only remember Mike and micheal. It was cool though. I had fun. Then we got back and did some written stuff. Some girl gave myself, the pretty girl I was talking to, and another guy some Hello kitty chacolate paper. It was brown and pretty cool. She looked filipina too. She was one of the few that could speak another language and I hope to figure out which one. I'll use my grandpa as common ground to start something. Then, as we left, I got a good conversation with that one girl who didn't want to talk. I had massaged her for the whole period; she wasn't going to elude me this day. That was nice, actually.

History with the old man

This was fun. And golly there were a ton of gorgeous females. It was ridiculous! Well, there was this one pair (who I'll be talking about a lot) that was definately cool. They first sat way behind me then went in front. They, too, had that "let's look cool and not look bad in front of this guy" look and body language--I happened to be the only guy in the room b/c it was still early. Then I saw another girl who worked at Jamba juice. She's really tall, like 6'2. I remeber seeing her at my brother in law's Softball game. Well then the class got really packed. Then the wierdest thing happened. The lights went out. It was all dark. I was probably that the first to push my indigo light on my watch, then everyone brought out there cell phone lights and all kinds of other stuff. It was kinda cool. Those two girls had this mini flash light. There was one that kept on going in and out. She came back in while the lights were out and the other asked "Why don't you go in the bathroom?" The other replied "I'm not going in there by myself!!!". I was lauging inside. I guess it was dark in there too. So one girl was using the flash light to help the other see as she fixed her makeup. Too Good I tell you. And I had thought I seen it all.

Points I learned

Be humble. Shoot, I was humbled today. I should have quit while I was ahead. I saw this one girl Alicia that liked me for a loooooong time now. Well, I guess we just "cut ties" now. I saw her but acted like I didn't until I was close. Then turned at the last moment. I wanted to see if it was the same. It wasn't. It was like she wanted to squeek by me. I thought then "It must be so." Then I went and messed it all up. I ended up seeing her in the parking lot and wanted to see if it was really "like that." Well, it was. I gave her greeting and she ignored me. It felt like a punch in the chest. It's a feeling that guys get from girls. It's unexplainable, actually. It just feels like that. And then she got in her car and I kept on walking. I didn't bother to see what car or nothing. We had spoken so well to. But it was probably my fualt. I actually went into this semester not wanting to keep old acquaintences b/c I want to make new ones. Well I do have her Cell phone # if that counts. heehee

The ride

Cold. It was cold this morning. It didn't help that when I ironed, some of the water got one my shirt. So I was made that much more cold. I didn't wear a jacket b/c I knew it would warm up again; but I did wear my big beenie. It looks funny on me but I like it. As I was standing, some girl stepped next to me and kinda smirked. I thought it was a friendly smirk but she could have been laughing at much oversized beenie. I also saw the young girl today.
I don't know why she takes the bus to go 8 miles away to HS. I don't even know why she doesn't go to the HS here in town. I ended up sitting next to her b/c the bus was a little packed. (makes me really get my job to get a ride now)
The ride itself was kinda somber. Everybody was quiet. She(the little girl) was quiet as a stone;her friend wasn't on either. I think the driver wisened up and put on the heater. Crap I was still freezing! The last time I got on the bus I got off at a stop and not the transit. Today I wanted to get off to see if the girl, who I thought was making fun of me, was going to the Community College that I was.
Well it ends up that she did. I had to talk to her, and I did talk to her. We discussed nothing really deep. The whole "what class where are you from" conversation. I was first asking the questions then she started shooting some back. Some girls I talk to don't really talk when I confront them for the first time. It takes time and then they really open up--that's what I like best about socializing.

First period was ok. Not much happened so I'll skip it.

Second period

This was actually fun. The teacher, I think, is a good teacher. He's really involved and into his students and the material. It's cool to have a teacher that cares about your name.
Today was fun. For some reason I was sitting in a girl triangle; one front, left and right. Shoot, they were all models. I don't know what was going on. I couldn't figure out why the other guys wanted to sit in the back when all the girls where in the middle and front. I took advantage of that. I got to know some of the names.
Patricia, anna, and erma were the three. Patricia is super cute. I mean really cute. Not knock out beautiful. And that is like a breath of fresh air. I saw Patrcia walking with a guy after class and it kinda got me wondering. I won't think nothing of it b/c I will just talk. Anna seems to have a nice/cool disposition.
Anna smiles a lot. She seems really nice. There is no pretense that I can see. She is really genuine. I like her. Not like that but for the way she acts. However, she, too, has amazing looks. Not a lot of make up either.
Erma is cool. I didn't pay attention much to her. But she's likes to speak out and kinda has a spanish accent.
The funny thing that happened in that class was myself and Patricia were trying to be sneaky when we scoped each other. It was too good. I mean, of course the guy has to get a look, but it tripped me out because I caught her out of the corner of my eye looking. Hah it was funny. Second period was good. The trip to third was different

As we left second, I found out the name of the quiet girl I met monday. The teacher wants to know our names so he called our names and then we were allowed to leave. The guy from Greenfield is still obsessed with my name. Tons of people call me different things, and he's exploring all the options; it's funny to get the same things over and over again. What was cool is that I saw a girl I call "Melissa" on the way up to the third floor.
Her real name is Angela, but I call her that for a reason.
When I first met her, I didn't want to make it seem like I was hitting on her, so, I called her a name and acted like that was it. She was tripping out but is so nice that she just accepted it. For over a year and a half we've kinda eyed each other but she's got a man. We were always kinda plantonic. She'd help me with homework and all that jive. It was nice. Well, today we kinda just passed each other up. I'm sure when I see her in the library some time I'll talk to her. We really haven't talked for close to a year but we still smile at each other--that's the way we greet each other. Then I walked up a few more and saw Isleen and Amanda Rocio.
When she was a freshman I was a senior. I was also her TA; that was fun. Wow she and her body has matured. She used to be a stick figure and now it "like whoa." But I blatantly ignored her and she did likewise(after she knew I wasn't going to say hello). I'm trying to "cut ties" with the past relationships. Stupid me b/c I always think I can talk occasionally after I've dissed them. This semester I'll try to keep it that way, though.

Third period

This was ok. The teacher is black and really bags on the white people. I feel bad sometimes. But he said "he was going to talk about everyone. He hates everyone." He's got a charisma about him and he makes people laugh. He can be offending though...even for someone who has a little black in'em.
Those two girls came in again. They really have crazy bodys. It's actually ridiculous. I don't give them the attenition that they want. I'll wait until maybe we get into a group or something. This one guy, though, couldn't keep his eyes off them. From the moment that they came, as they passed him to go to the back (of his row), until they sat down, and even when they were waiting for the teacher to begin, he was looking and taking glances. I was like "kick back dude." I feel like telling those type of guys to spit game if you are going to do that much looking. The middle of the class was interesting.
My stupid stomach was grumbling. Errrr. I hate that. The talked loud so I don't think that many heard it. It went off twice. Shoot, I was going to see if it would do it again but then I made the call: I was going to get something to eat. I left.
As I left, I saw, what seemed, to be another supermodel; I guess Cali is not in short supply. Well, I passed her up and her semi-pretty friend(both of them were looking over the balcony on the third floor). As I came back though, her booty was directed right toward me. I didn't take the bait b/c her friend was looking right at me. Nice one. I didn't think she'd like so I passed her kinda quick. Well to my chagrin, she gave the evil tempress eyes. She was "like whoa" (her face and body). Holy of holy. I thought shoot I blew it. But I wasn't in it for that anyways. I had business to take care of. It was kinda fun though. Messin' around and stuff.

Last (but certaintly not least) period

I had fun here. The teacher is so stupid. It's not that he doesn't know the material, rather, he doesn't explain it for jack. Good thing is I kinda know what's going on so I don't have to study as hard. I feel sorry for the other though. There was one girl who kept on telling the other how dumb the guy was. The guy next to me did the same. I thought it was funny. I think the funniest thing that happened was when he spoke about water molecules.
Well we actually were talking about significant #'s but some how he got onto water molecules. Really fast too. But not in General.
We ended up talking about "Cleopatra's" water molecules. He goes on to say how after ones death their water is absorbed by the atmosphere and all of that jive. Then he starts to say how some of us are probably drinking some of Cleopatra's water from her body. I thought it was funny. Most people, I thought, had no clue what he was talking about. He just didn't explain himself.
Well there is this one girl who sits in front of me who is off the chain. I mean wow. I can't mess up here. I actually spoke to her after class.
After class we spoke a little. She, too, knows what's going on. She thinks that the old man is having a hard time explaining himself(and he is). She's is super smart with all of that other stuff guys look for. Kinda looks like Reia but not. Just a tad resembleance. Funny thing is, as we were walking and talking, I saw another girl I had a class with.
It was noneother that the "Dandelion" girl(in my book of poetry). She's is definately pretty. Seems she knows the girl I was talking to. Hah. And she said hi but I didn't and I looked her in the eye too. Oops. She was smoking and all. The Dandelion girl is like a goddess, kinda. She has got all the look and body. She's super smart and very independent; she has her own place. There was no reason to dis her the way I did but I did. I think she cared a little. I could have pursued but wasted my time.

Points from the day

Can't act shy, silly, or uncomfortable around girls.
I saw this one guy get dissed all day trying to talk to this one girl. In my speech class, we talked about how girls thought about guys and vice-versa. One thing that was elluded to was strength.
Man, you gotta act it sometimes. I don't know why but you just have to. It's silly and some people call stereotypical but it's true. All of these girls say it's not "normal" if a guy acts otherwise. I found that out in the last part of the day. No one disses me when I talk to them. Hec, I talked to a ton of girls today. The last one went weird.
It happened to be the girl I thought was a freshman. She ends up to be SENIOR is HS. I asked her a few questions and all. Delivery was sub-par and response was fair. I'm not used to fair. Crap, I'm used to a lot better. But eye contact and good posture will help that. I'm not sure how if I'll talk to her again until I get those down. hee hee

Today was a crappy day.

The ride

I got off early to get a ride with a girl I knew. It would have saved me about 20+ dollars a week if things went the way I would have liked. But it was not to be. The dad ends up telling me he doesn't feel comfortable with me and her riding to school. Shoot, almost.

First period sucked. We just talked math. I did find out that they have my math book in the library and I can use it only in the building; it's better then nothing.

I cryed man. Not having a job is wearing on me, actually. I was in a lonely compartment in the back of the library. As I was crying, a guy, who I knew from my last semester math class(Intermediate Algebra), saw me. We've spoken before. He's a little older and has some good things to say. I don't get involved when it comes to hearing a religious sermon from someone not of my religion. He thought I was crying because I was sinning. After I told him, he gave me his # and showed me to this place, in the college, where I could find a job. That was cool. I threw his # away though. I don't associate with some people. I did, though, take a few points from what he said.

Chem Lab

Before I got there I saw the "Dandelion" girl. Wow. She has transformed her body. She looks great. She used to be just the most beatiful face in the world, now, she has sculpted that body. She used to have a lot of baby fat. I thought after talking to the Reia girl that she might be a little jealous and would not give me her greetings. Ends up she smiled first and I obliged her. She's still cool with me and I like that. Funny thing is, I still don't know her name. I'll get it some day, and when I do, I'll submit it here. I want to know what it is.

It was ok. Me and an old associate from my HS ended up sitting together. I was actually going to have this girl, who kinda resembles Reia, work with us. I thought that that would be a little over zealous so I cut that idea. Funny because she sits on the other side of the room. But in lecture, she sits in front of me. hehe We just learned about safety and all that jive. I've been in a lab and know what's going on. They are definately cool.

Points I took home:

Gotta work hard. God does not do your homework or look for a job for you. You have to really do everything in your power to get what you want and where you need to go. It's hard but it has been done. We'll see where this semester takes me.

Brief Recap from wed to friday

Well I met Natalie. She's got that Smart beauty. She kinda looks like someone I know, Lilly. And both of them are really really smart. It's her wits that make her smart. She was capping on me big time. She' very sarcastic. I let her win for two days and now I'm going to turn on the heat. I'm firing back and let's see if she can handle it like a big girl. This will be fun. We actually met on the bus. She was sitting on the other side of the bus. Then she had to move b/c there was a wheelchair. So I moved my bags and she insticntualy sat next to me. I hoped she would. We spoke and got to know each other. That was cool. The next day we bumped heads again but at a different time. She was going to have to pay more money b/c of time zones and stuff. I opened my wallet and sifted through it. She looked at me as if. I put it away and asked her though and she said "I got money" with a little bit of attitude. I knew, though, that she was flattered. Here I was, someone she didn't know, and I was going to help her. Well then, she sat infront of me and could have very well faced sideways or adjacent to the direction I was facing. Instead, she faced the same way I did thereby turning her back to me. Ha, she shunned be. Maybe she was just trying to digest it all. Well, some guy sat next to her and again she could have faced adjacent, but instead she faced me directly. Oh man, she was wearing a purple shirt and had purple eye shadow. Jee wiz. I knew she wanted to talk to me. She tryed to act shady but I got her. Our convesations were random and just about little things. Then, at this one stop, this really young but amazing girl got on. The senior who looks like a freshman. I predicted how Natalie would act, so I turned my head towards the road. Man!, she mad dogged her bad. That was pretty crazy though. It ends up, however, that she lives with a bf, which she was reluctant to tell. Ha, I haven't seen her since. I might not at all b/c of some outstanding circumstances. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.:)

Today was cool. As the days move on, I'm finding less things to talk about. I guess the infatuation of this semster is over and it's time to get on with bigger things. Or at least more important things.

My first period was cool. I need a stupid calculator for this Stats though. Funny thing is, 20 cent is in my class too! What a small world. I ended up asking this one girl who sits to my left where she got her calculator. She said "E-bay" and that "there are tons" of them. Yup, that's where I'm going tonight. I want to ask her if she'll help me and 20 cent with some homework or tests one of these days. Shoot, I got to get my manipulating game face on. She'll help...I hope.hehe She's got to be the most intelligent girl in the class. She's not that pretty but not ulgy. She looks like an odd and sweet girl, but she's got a tattoo that runs across her back and belly. There are quite big, actually. I like my stats class. I am taking the same teacher that I had last semester for Algebra 2.

Second period

This class is always a pleasure. Forget that there's a ton of pretty girls, the teacher is a blast. He really gets you motivated. It's a speech class and I enjoy it. I'm starting to learn a lot of communication skills and human psychology. It's neat to know where some things originate and such. I've actually got to get my book for that class too. I know a friend's cousin who is taking the same class so and I asked him if we could read sometime. I had to talk to him. I'm actually getting better at having people do things for me. I'm not overwhelming like I'd like to be, but I hope to get there.

Third

It sucked. Not much to speak of here.

Fourth

Nathin'.

I watched and watch the track practice. I wanted so badly to join this year. I watched some of the practices last year and even ran my miles while they were practicing. It's something I do. I know the twins that run. They are pretty good. They are my primary reason. They gave me a ride to school and back for part of last semester. I also go to entertain myself. I like to watch. Today I saw this pole volter do it wrong and instead of going up, he went forward and flew over most of the mat. Half of his body was on the mat and the other half was off. It was funny as hec. He was lucky though. It could have been much worse. I wish life was a little kind at the moment. I would have joined this year. I wanted to get a little closer to this one girl. I wasn't stalking, just would have liked the chance to talk. She used to like me all kinds. I never did anything. I don't, usually, but I will talk and do all that other jive. Shoot, I worked hard to and got in shape. I'll keep at it b/c running keeps me healthy, but that would have been the icing on the the cake. Brenda and Heidi. Man, they both work hard and have crazy bodies. I don't look with lust, though. I try not to freak the girls out when I watch. I can tell some of them are though. I just really kick back and watch.

I put an application today to. It was at hullabaloo. Dang, it was quiet over there. I don't know how much business they get. I really just want to acquire the serving skills. I know a lot, but I don't know the retail side of it. That's what I kinda want to learn. That and to be comfortable around customers. It's really not a prob, but this will be in a new environment. A whole new beast.

Ah today was fun.:)

The ride

I now go with my friend up to school. I'll prolly get a ride to and from school instead of going on the bus. It takes money. I take it but not all the way up anymore.
It was funny b/c I didn't call him b/c I was kinda in a rush. I needed to break a five. I went to the bakery and bought something for 15 cents. haha When I got to his house, he was still in his pajamas. But he was cool and took me to school anyway.

1st. period

Cool. I've been trying to get on this one girl's good side. Ha, you could kinda tell she didn't want any of it, but as the conversation kept going, she was the one giving answers for questions that I hadn't even asked for. I thought at that point that it was cool. I can talk but not as good as Redd or Stage. I'm getting there though. Me and 20cent took off and jacked around on DA after that.

Break

This was cool. Me and 20 sat on chair away. Funny thing is a pretty girl was sitting in between us. I kinda tripped out but then cooled the jets. I thought about talking but na. I felt I did something wrong though. I'll keep that to myself though. The funny thing is that we PM each other and we are sitting right next to each other.lol

Lab

Yesterday, towards the end of lecture, I saw the girl that looks like Reia drawing a picture of the teacher. Mr. Graybil is a character. It's also painful to sit in his lecture. He's the stupidest teacher alive. But oh well. Well it just so happened that my partner was drawing the teacher too! So I asked him for it and he did. He had a look of suspiciousness and when I gave showed her the pic, she started laughing. Then she went to get hers to show us and said "look, mine is better". Hilarious. The whole class prolly didn't know what we were laughing at either; it was pretty quiet. To that point I thought that she was trying to avoid me or some. She always looks back for no particular reason, though. Huh. But now it's all good.
Today, her and her lab partner asked my group for some matches. Then again and again. I can't lie, when I went over there, I knew there were three super pretty girls so I asked if we could use there calculator; ours was broken. The funny thing is, 1)I have no idea how they knew we had some matches for the lab and 2)we were exactly on the opposite of the room; they could have asked a grip of ladies right there. Well I didn't get the pretty asian's calc but I got the Reia girl's. It was nice too. She offered it to me.
The Lab itself was a bear. So easy but I had to stupid guys with me. They had the flame about 5 inches high. I was like I'm outty if you got the flame this high. Man, we were yelling and arguing louder and worse than the girls. The stupid teacher wouldn't even answer my questions. We finished it, though.
After class I gave the calculator back. But you know me, I had to ask her name. Funny b/c there were moms and dads and homies all around. I was oblivious. I was a step away from getting the #(I could tell), but I didn't. Her face lit up, though, when I asked her. As she left, I asked "what's her friends name"(the one who asked and wasted all our mathches for lab). She thought I asked her "what's your first name" again. She lit up again. Then I told her that they owe us some more mathches for using all ours up. Too Good. Everyone was laughing.

Oh, her name is Laura. So no need to call the "The Reia" girl.:D

Misc. I saw Brenda today. I thought she was like "whatver" with me, too! She smiled and greeted me first. But stupid me, I walked away fast. arg

point
Don't be too shy. I could have hooked up with two girls today. arg, sometimes I get stupid, though. I'll challenge a girl the next time. I always look away first. haha

To be frank....


I think it goes back to the idea that a woman has yet to define her wants, herself, and her role in a relationship. So then, she requests of her man to wait for that day. And in the days thereafter, she will be more pleasing to him.
A tender kiss as her promise of unwavering affection til that day