Hello All,
Well, it has been a while and I have just been reading what all of you are saying. But now I feel that I need to write once more. It finally happened, I finally said what I felt. It was Saturday night and I was pretty trashed, but from what I remember I told him that I don't want to be with him. I had hinted at that before, but never been that cold about it. I am so sorry if I hurt you Al, but I really just need your understanding and friendship. If you cannot offer that I can understand, but you need to be honest with me. Cause I do need someone to turn to. Things are only getting worse at home and I can't depend on any of my girlfriends to talk to. ONLY YOU UNDERSTAND! That is what hurts. Casue I know you care about me and I know that you wanted more. But I also know that I just need friendship. I proved to myself this weekend that I have a lot of friends... some of which came out of nowhere. But I also realized that none of them compare to you.

sorry.... hit the wrong button.... I have more to say.
I need to ask everyone a question. What do I do? I care about alan in a way that I don't think anyone else can. We know secrets about each other that no one else knows. But if everyone thinks it is only hurting him to stay around I am going to stop. I don't want to be with him... and I don't want to be with anyone else. I just want to figure out who I am. But I need someone to turn to. My parents got a divorce about a year ago and the past year has been hell. Now, they are trying to get back together and due to things that happened my mom has said that if she moves back in I can't live here anymore. SO I am trying to put my life back together and Al is the only one who knows the real me. I hide the real me from a lot of people because I am ashamed of who I am... but not in front of him. So, now what do I do?

Wow, that is hard

Have ya thought about why you don't want to be with him? are you just scared? Do you not feel a romantic attraction anymore?

It CAN (under limited) circumstnaces be possible for exes to be friends...but normally it means something more for one person than the other...

I want to see what everyone says before I reply, if I do..

just let me know when you are ready for my comments.. :)

Oh boy . . .

Well, basically, if you stay around Al you're only doing it because you need an emotional crutch. You already admitted that you don't want to "be" with him, but you need SOMEONE, and he's a great choice.

Well, you have to ask yourself this: what about when I DON'T need him? Also, what about when you DO find someone else?

Basically, you KNOW he likes you and wants SOMETHING, but you have no intentions (at least right now), but you DO need, in my words, an emotional tampon.

Two ways to look at it. If you don't mind being a crud, use him. If you DO mind being a crud, find someone else.

Or, of course, you can always rationalize it that if he's dumb enough to stick around, he deserves what he gets, but that's a little humanistic for me.

You know Dave, if you would just admit that you're wrong about religion, we'd get along great!:D j/k

You can just repeat what Dave said for my response.

Yeah, Dave has a good point.

Exes as friends...
I don't think it can ever happen if one person wants more than the other. You're in a position of power over Wedge because you can do/say anything you want because you know that he still wants you. Right from the start the friendship isn't on an equal footing. I honestly don't see it ever getting there. If you really care about him and his feelings, bow out gracefully for awhile. Otherwise, you're just being selfish and using him.

If you really need someone to talk to, I suggest getting counseling. I'm not trying to be mean or sarcastic, I'm serious about this. This sort of situation is exactly what counselors are for. In fact, I think you should get into counseling even if you think you don't need someone to talk to. This situation seems much larger than you (or anyone else) can handle. Maybe a neutral ear will put a fresh spin on things and help you gain a clearer perspective.

Originally posted by jwreck
You know Dave, if you would just admit that you're wrong about religion, we'd get along great!:D j/k

You can just repeat what Dave said for my response.

I would JW, but lying is a sin . . . :D

Besides, I can't have you burning in hell for all eternity on my concious, now can I?

LOL!!! :D:D:D

are you both with other people now? i thought i read somewhere that you are both in relationships with others. if you are you should really consider why you are in these relationships.

Exstillinlove- you can't always be certain that he's gonna be there your whole life so you have to let others in, wether it be a counselor or another lover (anyone you feel will really listen and advise). its not fair to hurt him over and over which you are if he still cares for you the way you say he does. by letting him know you don't have feelings you are doing the right thing but i don't think enough time has past for you to be friends. its not gonna be a good time until both of you can look at each other and realize that is all it is. i have a very healthy relationship with my ex and its because we realize we worked as friends not lovers and trying to be something that we can't will only lead to problems.

wedge- as hard as it can be i would really get over her quick...not saying completely get rid of her but realize its not gonna be a happy reunion. there is a reason why you aren't together and she hasn't changed...you said so yourself in her last post. why keep hurting yourself? you seem to a be a good guy, intelligent. if you are in a relationship with someone else give her a try..you never know she might be the one...you could be missing her because you and your ex are still trying to work something that can't be worked.

i dunno i'm not one to really say what to do...i feel its your choice. you choose to be in the relationship and stay in the relationship because its what you want in some weird way. i'm not exactly in the simpliest relationship myself...i need advice just as the last person. hey anyone know how to break bad habits of your significant other? that for another post!

well I am not going to say much, I just want to make a couple things quite clear.. after saturday night, she doesn't have to worry about me chasing her anymore.. what I wanted was for me and her to be like we use to.. my birthday, her prom, the trip we took to hellen, fourth of july, even a couple weeks ago the couple hours we spent together, was all great times, and I do miss those, but honestly I realized what does it matter now? yeah, back then I was happy to be with her, and tried sometimes successfully to make her happy with me.. but as of right now, it all went away, so I keep asking myself what does it really matter.. the answer? nothing, if something is so trivial that it can go away that easy, then I don't want it.. I was beginning to think when we were having a good time together, that it would end shortly, which would kill all joy.. so do I really want her back, worring everyday that it might be the last? nope.. I will take someone that actually wants me..

the things said this weekend while she wasted can never be retracted.. the lies can never be forgotten.. I can forgive, but she doesn't even want my forgiveness.. she has appologized for "hurting" me which she shouldn't have.. I realized I was going to get hurt, when I signed up to be in the war.. I blame myself more than I blame her, I would probably do the same thing if I was in her shoes.. I guess she just doesn't want me.. it's ok.. I would rather know then be played.. I hope she finds someone she does want.. or whatever she is looking for

Blah, blah, blah . . . .Blah, blah, blah . . . .Blah, blah, blah . . . .Blah, blah, blah


Yeah, whatever . . . now when do we get to go to the titty bar??

Another day and things only get harder to deal with. This will most likely be the last post I put on this site. So, I will try to get everything out now. I have never been the first to be honest with people. But for the past month I have been completely honest with everyone in my life. I guess that is why I had to tell Al that I didn't want to be with him. The other reason is because I know him and Kaley are not together, but they should be. She loves him and I just keep getting in the way. Al, as a friend that cares about you I am going to say a few things. First, I am sorry, for everything, I am sorry that I am not the person you wanted me to be, I am sorry that I led you to believe we had more than we had, I am sorry that I took you away from a girl who loves you very much. I am also sorry that I have not been the type of person you could be open and honest with at all times. I know I make it hard for you to be around me. But you don't have to go through any of this anymore. I am going to be fine.
I am not going to see a counselor. I can't. I went to one for a few month last year, but because of certain things I really can't do that. Al, you know what those reasons are. If a counselor heard some of those things a lot of people would be effected. But I am learning to deal with this in a new way. Maybe it will be for the best. I didn't come home till 4:00 am this morning and my mom was still here. I guess half the reason I didn't come home for so long was cause I hoped that she would wake up and leave. That didn't happen. I am going to have to deal with all of this instead of just talking to Al about it. Al, I am sorry that I put my problems on you.
I am not with anyone, nor am I looking for anyone. I don't want a relationship because I am so lost that I don't think it would be fair for any guy to have to put up with me right now. I am becoming friends with new people and I am starting to see that life is what we make it. I have made it harder on myself than it really is. My life is more complicated than a lot of people I know, but God will never give me more than I can handle. I guess thats were I need to focus, just dealing with one thing at a time and then letting it go. I have a habit of holding on to things too long. I am not doing that anymore.
Al, you are a great person who deserves so much more than what I can give you. I'm not saying its Kaley, but there is someone out there who is just right for you. Someone who wants you just as much as you want her. It may be a while before you find that person. But I hope that you find happiness. I have been really selfish and expected you to be unhappy so that I could have someone to lean on. Well, I am sorry, you don't deserve that. I hope you find that dream girl that you wrote about. And I also hope that you can find what you are looking for in life.
Well, I think that is all I need to say. Al, I will always be here if you need me. Make yourself happy, you need that!

I came in here expecting some vastly intelligent post.. instead I get invited to the titty bar.. oddly enough I am happy.. :)

Originally posted by ExStillinlove
Another day and things only get harder to deal with. This will most likely be the last post I put on this site. So, I will try to get everything out now. I have never been the first to be honest with people. But for the past month I have been completely honest with everyone in my life. I guess that is why I had to tell Al that I didn't want to be with him. The other reason is because I know him and Kaley are not together, but they should be. She loves him and I just keep getting in the way. Al, as a friend that cares about you I am going to say a few things. First, I am sorry, for everything, I am sorry that I am not the person you wanted me to be, I am sorry that I led you to believe we had more than we had, I am sorry that I took you away from a girl who loves you very much. I am also sorry that I have not been the type of person you could be open and honest with at all times. I know I make it hard for you to be around me. But you don't have to go through any of this anymore. I am going to be fine.
I am not going to see a counselor. I can't. I went to one for a few month last year, but because of certain things I really can't do that. Al, you know what those reasons are. If a counselor heard some of those things a lot of people would be effected. But I am learning to deal with this in a new way. Maybe it will be for the best. I didn't come home till 4:00 am this morning and my mom was still here. I guess half the reason I didn't come home for so long was cause I hoped that she would wake up and leave. That didn't happen. I am going to have to deal with all of this instead of just talking to Al about it. Al, I am sorry that I put my problems on you.
I am not with anyone, nor am I looking for anyone. I don't want a relationship because I am so lost that I don't think it would be fair for any guy to have to put up with me right now. I am becoming friends with new people and I am starting to see that life is what we make it. I have made it harder on myself than it really is. My life is more complicated than a lot of people I know, but God will never give me more than I can handle. I guess thats were I need to focus, just dealing with one thing at a time and then letting it go. I have a habit of holding on to things too long. I am not doing that anymore.
Al, you are a great person who deserves so much more than what I can give you. I'm not saying its Kaley, but there is someone out there who is just right for you. Someone who wants you just as much as you want her. It may be a while before you find that person. But I hope that you find happiness. I have been really selfish and expected you to be unhappy so that I could have someone to lean on. Well, I am sorry, you don't deserve that. I hope you find that dream girl that you wrote about. And I also hope that you can find what you are looking for in life.
Well, I think that is all I need to say. Al, I will always be here if you need me. Make yourself happy, you need that!

like it always was and it always will be.. she meets new people and it's bye bye for me.. I have say that most of this utterly bullshit.. I am sorry if I sound like an *******, but I think I earned it.. I just hope you never come back

Originally posted by ExStillinlove
Another day and things only get harder to deal with. This will most likely be the last post I put on this site. So, I will try to get everything out now. I have never been the first to be honest with people. But for the past month I have been completely honest with everyone in my life. I guess that is why I had to tell Al that I didn't want to be with him. The other reason is because I know him and Kaley are not together, but they should be. She loves him and I just keep getting in the way. Al, as a friend that cares about you I am going to say a few things. First, I am sorry, for everything, I am sorry that I am not the person you wanted me to be, I am sorry that I led you to believe we had more than we had, I am sorry that I took you away from a girl who loves you very much. I am also sorry that I have not been the type of person you could be open and honest with at all times. I know I make it hard for you to be around me. But you don't have to go through any of this anymore. I am going to be fine.
I am not going to see a counselor. I can't. I went to one for a few month last year, but because of certain things I really can't do that. Al, you know what those reasons are. If a counselor heard some of those things a lot of people would be effected. But I am learning to deal with this in a new way. Maybe it will be for the best. I didn't come home till 4:00 am this morning and my mom was still here. I guess half the reason I didn't come home for so long was cause I hoped that she would wake up and leave. That didn't happen. I am going to have to deal with all of this instead of just talking to Al about it. Al, I am sorry that I put my problems on you.
I am not with anyone, nor am I looking for anyone. I don't want a relationship because I am so lost that I don't think it would be fair for any guy to have to put up with me right now. I am becoming friends with new people and I am starting to see that life is what we make it. I have made it harder on myself than it really is. My life is more complicated than a lot of people I know, but God will never give me more than I can handle. I guess thats were I need to focus, just dealing with one thing at a time and then letting it go. I have a habit of holding on to things too long. I am not doing that anymore.
Al, you are a great person who deserves so much more than what I can give you. I'm not saying its Kaley, but there is someone out there who is just right for you. Someone who wants you just as much as you want her. It may be a while before you find that person. But I hope that you find happiness. I have been really selfish and expected you to be unhappy so that I could have someone to lean on. Well, I am sorry, you don't deserve that. I hope you find that dream girl that you wrote about. And I also hope that you can find what you are looking for in life.
Well, I think that is all I need to say. Al, I will always be here if you need me. Make yourself happy, you need that!


Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me,

Oh, and lest I forget, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, and my needs . . .

like it always was and it always will be.. she meets new people and it's bye bye for me.. I have say that most of this utterly bullshit.. I am sorry if I sound like an *******, but I think I earned it.. I just hope you never come back

Blah, blah, blah, she doesn't care, blah, blah, blah, she just wants to get a reaction, blah, blah, blah, reminds me of my sophomore year in high school, blah, blah, blah, you weren't getting any anyway, blah, blah, blah . . .

Look, me, Bill, and Cosmo are going to the titty bar . . . are you in or not?

Originally posted by D Durden
Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me,

Oh, and lest I forget, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, my needs, and my needs . . .

like it always was and it always will be.. she meets new people and it's bye bye for me.. I have say that most of this utterly bullshit.. I am sorry if I sound like an *******, but I think I earned it.. I just hope you never come back

Blah, blah, blah, she doesn't care, blah, blah, blah, she just wants to get a reaction, blah, blah, blah, reminds me of my sophomore year in high school, blah, blah, blah, you weren't getting any anyway, blah, blah, blah . . .

Look, me, Bill, and Cosmo are going to the titty bar . . . are you in or not?

OMFGLMAO I just busted at out work laughing now people are staring at me.. LOL

am I in?? hell yeah...

Cha-ching... Did I hear boobies?

I smell virtual titty bar in the everything forum :D

Virtual? Crap man, I know this spot in Nashville where . . . . oh crap, I'll bet LIsa is planning my beating right now . . . damn it . . .

"did I say titty bar?? I mean.. .. er umm... ok I meant titty bar.. but it's just because I want to see boo... *whap* I mean, Al needs to get some.. "

See, titty bars are a man's natural habitat. It's the place where being the "great hunter" actually means something. Look at it this way, I can go in a t.b., walk up to some incredibly gorgeous girl sitting with some guy that looks like Brad Pitt, and I can have her in my lap for x dollars. If I'm a better "hunter" than Mr. Pitt, he'll have to find a lower cost unit . . . if you know what I mean?

I mean, crap, as a man, what more COULD you want. Scantily clad women ready to be naked at your beck and call, loud music, sports on the television, women bringing you drinks, and you can scream, yell, and make fun of your friends. Crap, if there was just a big open pit to grill roast beast in and maybe a shooting range, I'd move in one. LOL!!!!!

And, sadly, it's probably the safest place in the world for a "taken" man. You couldn't score there (for the most part) with a pencil and piece of paper. LOL! It's all for show . . . *sigh*. Most of the girls I've "met" were married with three kids and a nice place in the "burbs".

But, for $20, she'll be whoever for 7 minutes . . . LOL!

Originally posted by D Durden
. . . . oh crap, I'll bet LIsa is planning my beating right now . . . damn it . . . Hell, that sounds like more fun than a titty bar! Ya freak you!!:D

Originally posted by jwreck
Hell, that sounds like more fun than a titty bar! Ya freak you!!:D

*sigh* . . . oh definitely . . . she's an absolute dream . .

Since when is it just a man's habitat? I love strip joints. :p

Originally posted by buggy
Since when is it just a man's habitat? I love strip joints. :p

OK so when are we gonna party together?;) I got passes to the Mens Club!:D

Originally posted by jwreck


OK so when are we gonna party together?;) I got passes to the Mens Club!:D

Damn, high class joint :) I've only been to Heartbreakers and Rick's. The day my husband and I went, they had pretty hot broads at HB! That was my first time going, I asked him to take me. I had a blast :)

TITTY BAR!!???

Hey...uh...you know..I never gave you guys any tickets or nothing....and I got this big pocket full of singles.......

LMAO... we'll call it even for not locking me up for stagatory rape.. :)

if you check out the everything forum.. you don't even have to leave the house.. :D:D:D

Originally posted by buggy


Damn, high class joint :) I've only been to Heartbreakers and Rick's. The day my husband and I went, they had pretty hot broads at HB! That was my first time going, I asked him to take me. I had a blast :)
IMNSHO Heartbreakers is the best club in Houston. Best looking women, no 3 foot law, its just cool. I'm even gonna check into gettin a job there! Wouldn't that be the shit!!:D :D