Since Princess griped about us 'evil' males telling blonde jokes as part of her "Male Bashing" thread, I HAD TO start up a thread on it:D Esp since she's actually a Brunette anyway.

Personally, some of the hottest girls I've seen are Blondes, but so is my evil, soul-less, bloodsucking ex-girlfriend. Given that, Blonde jokes always will have a special place in my heart:D Let's just keep them tasteful people! :) Remember it's all in fun after all:)


Why do some Blondes have square boobs?
They forget to take the tissue out of the box :D

What do you call it when a Blonde dyes her hair another color??
Artificial Intelligence :D

What do you call three blonds standing next to each other? Wind tunnel.

What do you call a brunette who hangs out with blonds? Interpreter.

What's the first thing the blond said after being told she's pregnant? Are you sure its mine?

One long one. The boss comes to the blonds desk and finds her crying. He asks "What's wrong?" She says "I just found out my Mom died." He says "I'm sorry." She says "It gets worse. I just talked to my sister and her Mom died too!!"

I got more, but I'll let everyone have a turn.

So there's this woman who just starting working at a sex toy shop, and the owner says 'Ok, I'm going to lunch. Do you think you can handle the store for an hour?' And the woman says 'Sure, no problem.'

So first a black woman walks into the store. And she says 'I'm looking for a dildo.' And the woman behind the counter goes 'Ok, we've got white dildos and black dildos.' And the black woman says, 'Hmm...I've never had sex with a white guy. I'll take a white dildo.' And the woman behind the counter says 'That'll be $25.' The woman pays, gets the dildo, and leaves.

Then a white woman walks into the store. And she says 'I'm looking for a dildo.' And the woman behind the counter goes, 'Ok, we've got white dildos and black dildos.' And the white woman says, 'Hmmm...I've never had sex with a black guy. I'll take a black dildo.' And the woman behind the counter says 'That'll be $25.' The woman pays, gets the dildo, and leaves.

Then a blonde walks into the store. And she says 'I'm looking for a dildo.' And the woman behind the counter goes, 'Ok, we've got white dildos and black dildos.' The blonde thinks for a minute, then goes, 'Ooh, what about that plaid one behind the counter?' The cashier looks confused for a moment, then goes 'That'll be $25.' The blonde pays, gets it, and leaves.

So then the store owner comes back and asks the woman how things went. The woman goes, 'Great! I sold a black dildo, a white dildo, and I got 25 bucks for your thermos!'


(Ok, so maybe that's more of an everything forum joke....but it's my mom's favorite joke - I think the best part of it is remembering my mom telling it to me and saying 'dildo' like 20 times.)

How can you tell if a Blonde in confused?

She has a tampon behind her ear and can't find her pencil.

Did you hear about the two blondes who died at the drive in movie theater last year?
It was during a terrible snow storm. They went to see "Closed for the season".

These two women, a blonde and a red head, and a man were stuck on this island. After a while the blonde says "I will go and get help", so she swims to the shore. A while later the red head says "she has been gone a long time", so she takes a boat and rows to the shore. After much time, the man gets lonely and decides that the other two are not comming back, so he crosses a bridge and gets back.:D

A blond is unemployed for awhile. She really is going broke but can't find a job no matter how she tries. She decides to kidnap a child for ransom money. She goes to Central Park and watches for awhile. Then she grabs a kid and pins a note in his jacket that says, "If you ever want to see your kid alive again leave $10,000 dollars in an envelope behind the bicg oak tree in the center of the park. Signed, THE BLOND" Then she tells the kid to run straight home. The next day she looks behind the tree and sure enough, there is her $10,000 in an envelope. There's a note attached that says," I can't believe you would do this to me, us blonds are supposed to look out for each other."

Whats the difference between a blonde and a 747?
Not everyones been on a 747...

Whats the difference between a bunch of pygmies and a blonde track team?
The Pygmies are a bunch of cunning runts!

yay for blonde jokes!

Whats the difference between a blonde and the Titanic?

You know how many men went down on the Titanic.


What do door knobs and blondes have in common?

Everyone gets a turn.

Sorry blondes :)

Rayne

Check out this link. Be warned, not all the jokes are exactly clean.

hahahahahaha (http://www.ews.uiuc.edu/~awbailey/humor/Blonde_Jokes.html)

Why do blondes and Bill Clinton wear wool underwear?




























They need something to keep their ankles warm.

Cop pulls a blonde over, and after a brief conversation, tells her she has to take a breathalyser test...














She reaches for his zipper while whining: "I just took one of these 10 miles back!"

Why do blondes like convertibles?























More leg room.

What are the first two things a blonde does in the morning?






























Introduce herself, and go home.

How does a blonde turn on the lights after sex?






































Open the car door.

What's black and blue and lying in a ditch?

































A brunette who told too many blonde jokes...



and with that, I'll leave some for another time...LOL