What is marriage for you? What is in your mind when we say marriage? I want you guys to say something here... :)

A mutually-acknowledged partnership. A committment to one another. Anything else is is worked out between the two parties involved, and can be as unique as their own individual personalities require for them to live with one another.

Thanks que sera sera for the post reply... :)


Well for me, Marriage is a forever commitment between two committed couples...
What i have in mind when we say marriage? Romeo is in my mind when we speak about marriage.. :)

It depends entirely on the context in which the word is used. The marriage of science and technology is entirely different from the marriage of my father and mother.

But since we're in the Relationships forum, I'll just go with romantic marriage.

It's a way to consolidate assets and legitimate sexual intimacy in the eyes of prudish, traditionalist, conformist, or religiously minded individuals who would otherwise deem such intimacy "morally corrupt."

In other words, it's :bs:.

Romeo is in my mind when we speak about marriage.. :)

So you fantasize about an adult male lusting after and sexually abusing a 13-year-old girl?

Kinky.

It's a way to consolidate assets and legitimate sexual intimacy in the eyes of prudish, traditionalist, conformist, or religiously minded individuals who would otherwise deem such intimacy "morally corrupt."

I'm not quite this cynical but it is the direction that I lean. Marriage is a piece of paper, a front to society. A couple can have just as strong and committed relationship without a marriage license as with. It's just that marriage is accepted as the "norm," we're expected to get married. From the time we are little children we are taught that marriage is good and single/divorced is bad when you just can't break it down that simply.

I assume some day I will probably get married but I don't see it as this glowing white end-all to my life's journey, it's not my goal, it's just something along the way that will probably happen and when it does I'll probably love it but I'm not out looking for it, not pining away that I'm 28 and not married yet, not even really caring right now :shrug:

It's a way to consolidate assets and legitimate sexual intimacy in the eyes of prudish, traditionalist, conformist, or religiously minded individuals who would otherwise deem such intimacy "morally corrupt."


Right, because only prudes who believe in teh Jebus get married and it's all about money and sex..

Complete intimacy with another person, emotional, physical, mental. A partnership in life.

I don't think it's a front.

I think it's a legal contract protecting the woman. In the past, marrying was the only goal for a woman, and why was that? Women did not even have inheritance rights in the past, so they relied on the men in their lives, brothes, uncles, guardians, husbands to provide their daily bread.

There's a lot of that in the essence of marriage today. It's all about financial liability. I sometimes think it is the corporations that idealized marriage through promotion, because marriage is a business. Take for example the honeymoon, almost mandatory right? Well, that's the business of tourism.:) And weddings, costing 30 - 50 k... That's entertainment business. Film production industry thrives on that sh*t. Bridal dresses and tuxedos - retail business... And so on.

In essence, it's about money. It's about ensuring spousal support and blackmailing the fleeting party into staying. Marriage is not about romance. It's an insurance policy.

In essence, it's about money. It's about ensuring spousal support and blackmailing the fleeting party into staying. Marriage is not about romance. It's an insurance policy.

Couples who believe this and get married for these reasons are doomed for failure.

What is marriage for you? What is in your mind when we say marriage? I want you guys to say something here... :)

Alimony.

Right, because only prudes who believe in teh Jebus get married and it's all about money and sex..

I was talking in more sociological, macroscopic terms.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, that is of course if you like living in an institution.
- Groucho Marx

Back in the times where your thinking, the romantic era of the globe. MArrage was a compleat boding of two people. And the phrase in the vows "until death do us part." refered to the adulterous behaviour resulting in death as a punishmen. (usually out of the anger of the spouse). So it actually ment something. Today it just means "Death do us aprt...or when i find someone better...or you get indipendently weathey and i can cash in"

Marriage is a wonderful institution, that is of course if you like living in an institution.
- Groucho Marx

He also said, "you are only as old as the woman you feel.."

Back in the times where your thinking, the romantic era of the globe. MArrage was a compleat boding of two people. And the phrase in the vows "until death do us part." refered to the adulterous behaviour resulting in death as a punishmen. (usually out of the anger of the spouse). So it actually ment something. Today it just means "Death do us aprt...or when i find someone better...or you get indipendently weathey and i can cash in"

And by romantic era you are of course referring to when marriage was decided by your family as part of a property arrangement. When the typical age of marriage for a girl was about 15. Yes, the good ol' days.

Couples who believe this and get married for these reasons are doomed for failure.

Bab, just because you have found an honest person who happens to share your ideology, does not mean the rest of the world functions the same way.

I had been in a situation with a boyfriend, where he refused to sign a prenup in case we were to get married, in order for me to protect my assets. Blatantly and rudely refused, with no excuse. Let's just say our asset ratio was 99-1.

So tell me... what's that all about?:)

Nah man, youz gotta protect yourself, not because you're a materialist, but because you refuse to be somebody's fool.

And I can't stress enough the fact that this tends to be an inconspicuous issue in situations where both parties are investing 50-50, from the start. Basically, mutual poverty can be a blessing in disguise, for if money/security is not your motivation, love sure as hell has to be.

you are only as old as the woman you feel..

That's a crock of sh*t...:rolleyes:

That's a crock of sh*t...:rolleyes:

You're right.. the quote is:

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

My bad.

You're right.. the quote is:

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

My bad.

heh. yeah, i've heard that one before, too. groucho was great.

heh. yeah, i've heard that one before, too. groucho was great.

Another favorite is "alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse." He really was a riot.

What is marriage for you? What is in your mind when we say marriage? I want you guys to say something here... :) I have been happily married over 16 years, we also dated 7. We have invested over 23 years!!!!
We have no children, and this has helped us, as I have seen many couples break up over them, or use them as excuse.
Marriage to me is partnership, a partner that helps build together.
Its about good and bad together. People always forget their vowels.

hw cld smne vr frgt thr vwls?

hw cld smne vr frgt thr vwls?

Funniest... post... ever....

So you fantasize about an adult male lusting after and sexually abusing a 13-year-old girl?

Kinky.




LOL... i am not a 13 year old Juliet now... :rofl: I am nearly in my mid 30's.. My romeo is not only lusting me but would want to marry me.. :)

I just don't know why majority seem had said their own piece about marriage negatively.. :(



My parents been into marriage for about 50 years.. Dad has just died last year and never i've heard trouble about their marriage as they are in one roof since they got married and never separate... :)


Yes true that it could be a piece of paper.. Could be a piece that you could be called husband and wife.. But try to think that other peoples marriages went successfuly good... it is just a matter of sacrifice i think..
if you want to be married, make sure that you want a long and lasting commitment to your partner no matter what and how hard ! :cool:

Marriage to me is a contract between to lovers and it sort of cements the deal so to speak that you are both a single entity!

I just don't know why majority seem had said their own piece about marriage negatively.. :(


We've all seen a lot of bad things happen with marriage, and some of DA's members have lived through them. There have been a few very long threads on DA about members who are going through divorces. It's extremely emotionally stressful. Those of us who haven't gone through it feel a lot of sympathy for whose who have, and we're doing our best to avoid a similar fate. That's why there have been so many negative responses. We're just trying to protect ourselves.

I think that the only way to protect yourself from a messy divorce is to take your time and if something just dont feel right or if there is any doubt in your mind in any way you should take even more time as to wait another year may be a little inconvenient but to choose wrong can be extremely painfull not to mention expensive so to me it just makes sence to play it slow and play it smart! Its no guarantee of success but I think that it increases your success greatly!

I just don't know why majority seem had said their own piece about marriage negatively.. :(

Americans just suck at rejection and failure. So we insure ourselves, insulate ourselves, and lash out at anything that might not work out the way we plan. Honestly, I feel like it is cowardice sometimes. I've been divorced once. It sucked, it hurt, and it is behind me. And for all of that the pleasure of going blindly forward and doing what I believed in was worth more than the pain and I will definitely do it again if the opportunity presents itself. You just have to be fearless sometimes.

I just don't know why majority seem had said their own piece about marriage negatively.. :(


note that none of them are married.

note that none of them are married.

:stupid:

note that none of them are married.

Correlation is not causation.

It's worth noting.

Yes, but are we single because we're afraid of marriage, or do we hate marriage because we haven't experienced it?

Yes, but are we single because we're afraid of marriage, or do we hate marriage because we haven't experienced it?

Maybe you haven't experienced it because you project negativity regarding it. Or maybe you've transposed the frustration of not finding a suitable and willing mate into a dislike of marriage in general.

You're right.. the quote is:

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

My bad.

So a 50 year old man with 20 year old woman should feel like a 20 year old man. Crock of sh*t.

I hope every old guy trying to get his groove on with a much younger woman gets what he deserves. Call it the "Mccartney" law. Good riddance. Keep on foolin' yourselves boyzzz...:) You're as old as you're old, and everyone can see it.

So a 50 year old man with 20 year old woman should feel like a 20 year old man. Crock of sh*t.

I hope every old guy trying to get his groove on with a much younger woman gets what he deserves. Call it the "Mccartney" law. Good riddance. Keep on foolin' yourselves boyzzz...:) You're as old as you're old, and everyone can see it.

sense of humor

noun
the trait of appreciating (and being able to express) the humorous; "she didn't appreciate my humor"; "you can't survive in the army without a sense of humor" [syn: humor]

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sense%20of%20humor

Maybe you haven't experienced it because you project negativity regarding it. Or maybe you've transposed the frustration of not finding a suitable and willing mate into a dislike of marriage in general.

No.

My parents' marriage was no picnic.

Out with old, in with the new, the society changed a lot since I was 18... Everyone became a slut...:) Divorce everywhere.

I am sceptical for those two reasons.

But I can see why some ppl would still hold on dearly to the traditional view. It's a nice idea, but unattainable in reality. In most cases. Even when you attain it, it's with struggle and sacrifice. So whatever.... I don't think I have a negative view, I just know exactly how much sh*t to expect. It's better than putting on rose-coloured glasses and waking up one day in hell, not knowing what hit you. Don't you think?:rolleyes:

sense of humor

I'm pretty sure Grim actually relates to that phrase.

Do we have to blame it to marriage the none working of relationships?? :D

No.

My parents' marriage was no picnic.

Out with old, in with the new, the society changed a lot since I was 18... Everyone became a slut...:) Divorce everywhere.

I am sceptical for those two reasons.

But I can see why some ppl would still hold on dearly to the traditional view. It's a nice idea, but unattainable in reality. In most cases. Even when you attain it, it's with struggle and sacrifice. So whatever.... I don't think I have a negative view, I just know exactly how much sh*t to expect. It's better than putting on rose-coloured glasses and waking up one day in hell, not knowing what hit you. Don't you think?:rolleyes:

No, I don't. I think if you are hell-bent on being miserable and suspicious you'll live a lifetime of unhappiness if not disappointment. If you throw the dice you'll have periods of sheer joy and points of disappointment and sorrow. I'm less afraid of getting hurt than I am of not enjoying Love with few reservations.

No, I don't. I think if you are hell-bent on being miserable and suspicious you'll live a lifetime of unhappiness if not disappointment. If you throw the dice you'll have periods of sheer joy and points of disappointment and sorrow. I'm less afraid of getting hurt than I am of not enjoying Love with few reservations.

How has this philosophy been workin out for you Grim?

Like so many things these days marriage has become disposable. If it's not working out or becomes difficult we are programmed to give up on it and move on.

I have/had 8 sets of aunts & uncles and they all married for life.

It might not seem a realistic proposition to us but it certainly did to them.

I think that nowadays we are spoiled and are not willing to fight for our marriage as our parents did! Mind you there are people that you just cant live with I am not disputing that but many people are not even willing to give it a try as the first little thing that happens they call it quits

How has this philosophy been workin out for you Grim?

I've had some really great times and some disastrous break-ups. And I still enjoy dating. How's your system working out?

I've had some really great times and some disastrous break-ups. And I still enjoy dating. How's your system working out?

I don't have a system.

I still say marriage is worth a try because my motto is better to try and fail than to fail to try!

I still say marriage is worth a try because my motto is better to try and fail than to fail to try!




Oh really?? so how will you propose your gal if you want to try with this marrying?? :)

No, I don't. I think if you are hell-bent on being miserable and suspicious you'll live a lifetime of unhappiness if not disappointment. If you throw the dice you'll have periods of sheer joy and points of disappointment and sorrow. I'm less afraid of getting hurt than I am of not enjoying Love with few reservations.



So true.. Others may say that you have to leave 50% for yourself...I just don't know how others could leave 50 %??
I will be just pretenseful being in love if i have to not give it all 100 % my heart... :)

Oh really?? so how will you propose your gal if you want to try with this marrying?? :)

I dont kmow Juliet, any suggestions?:D

I dont kmow Juliet, any suggestions?:D




Women never propose marriages so i don't know what to suggest!! :D

Today it just means "Death do us aprt...or when i find someone better...or you get indipendently weathey and i can cash in"

If we all actually thought that, we wouldn't be so afraid of getting married, would we?

I dont kmow Juliet, any suggestions?:D
Have the maitre d' bring her the ring in a glass of champagne. :nice:

Have the maitre d' bring her the ring in a glass of champagne. :nice:



I remember this one in a movie... I think the "SPIDERMAN"... Peter Parker requested the resto staffs to bring the glass of champagne with an engagement ring inside...


:)

Have the maitre d' bring her the ring in a glass of champagne. :nice:

Not bad cyclone ranger!:)

One of a woman's achievement is of marrying... :)

Marriage is like hot tub. The longer you're in it; the colder it gets.

Marriage is like hot tub. The longer you're in it; the colder it gets.

If you don't keep applying heat, of course. The problem is, too many people do think of it as a hot tub. They fill the tub with hot water, then climb in and just lay there relaxing and not doing anything else, and expect it to keep bringing them pleasure and fulfillment.

One of a woman's achievement is of marrying... :)
This is a very old fashioned view - that a woman's greatest achievement in life is to snag herself a husband. I think it's kind of sad. This suggests that women are nothing until they have nailed down a man to validate them. Women can achieve so much more than just finding a man.

This is a very old fashioned view - that a woman's greatest achievement in life is to snag herself a husband. I think it's kind of sad. This suggests that women are nothing until they have nailed down a man to validate them. Women can achieve so much more than just finding a man.


Don't be hypocrite... Every woman needs a man. You are either deverginized at a young age by a man.. Who validated you being a woman?? :D Your career?? :P

:eek:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v517/mtbbaboon/smilies/popcorn.gif

Actually I think its for both men and women as you really haven't accomplished everything until you get married!

:eek:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v517/mtbbaboon/smilies/popcorn.gif

You said a mouthfull there LOL!:)

You said a mouthfull there LOL!:)

I am just getting ready for the smackdown Tally may lay upon Juliet for that rude comment.

Actually I think tally's point is kind of sad as to suggest finding a mate is not important!

Do you really think that your carreer is more important then finding the ideal partner? I am talking to both men and women here! Finding a partner should be more important then money, career etc, and if you dont agree, no wonder so many of you get divorced!

Actually I think tally's point is kind of sad as to suggest finding a mate is not important!



Tally did not suggest that at all.

Well, lets just wait for tally's response then!

And hopefully she'll post some pics of her boobs, too! :eek3:

And hopefully she'll post some pics of her boobs, too! :eek3:

LOL!

And hopefully she'll post some pics of her boobs, too! :eek3:

she desire not for guys as maybe she wants not the male gender so you better not aspire tally to show anything to you men!! :rofl:

/ me pats the n00b.

Cute.

Wrong, but cute.

I still say marriage is worth a try because my motto is better to try and fail than to fail to try!
You're a guy - make sure you can afford it.
Women can achieve so much more than just finding a man.
Yes. The really clever ones find Guy 1, have a kid, find Guy 2, have a kid, find Guy 3, etc. Even better if the suckers have assets that can be converted to community property, or comingled so as to become community property.

Much smarter than finding just one man.

You're a guy - make sure you can afford it.

Yes. The really clever ones find Guy 1, have a kid, find Guy 2, have a kid, find Guy 3, etc. Even better if the suckers have assets that can be converted to community property, or comingled so as to become community property.

Much smarter than finding just one man.


Interesting point you make! I have a friend that is a lawyer and he tells me that its better to rent a home with your spouse even though you may own your own house so that your spouse cant claim the home as the matrimonial home or as you put it in the US community property! I am not sure if that would work in all states though! Because if I am not mistaken any property that you have accumilated before marriage that is not considered the matrimonial home is off limits to her, but then again she can claim support and in the case of kids, even child support! So I guess its still a crap shoot!

Interesting point you make! I have a friend that is a lawyer and he tells me that its better to rent a home with your spouse even though you may own your own house so that your spouse cant claim the home as the matrimonial home or as you put it in the US community property! I am not sure if that would work in all states though! Because if I am not mistaken any property that you have accumilated before marriage that is not considered the matrimonial home is off limits to her, but then again she can claim support and in the case of kids, even child support! So I guess its still a crap shoot!




Better no marriage to happen as in this case, i can see some selfishness... :D If people need their properties to remain theirs, don't ever ever get into marriage... :D


Sigh.. the reason why i stayed single for a long time and wait for the right man it is because i don't want to have a failure marriage either.. :nonono:

Going through life "alone" can be a sad experience, that I give ya.

However, marriage is not an achievement of any kind. Proof? Rate of adultery, and divorce. Unknown it may be, but by observing carefully, you can draw your own conclusions.

Maintaining a relationship in harmony, however, could be a sort of an achievement. Marriage has lost meaning due to many changes in human society, equality of sexes, increase in promiscuity, adultery and divorce etc. Nothing is holy anymore, and we all know it. To claim otherwise with a mountain of proof against it, would be deceiving yourself.

I ain't saying I wouldn't get married, but to me it's like baptising an adult atheist - because he/she has to "belong". Its pure conformism. Now you have to ask yourself the question, are you a person that needs to conform, or are you gonna live on your own terms? Very often people get married to project a sort of image of an orderly lifestyle...

What I'm saying is... If you and your partner love each other strongly, want a family and feel that there's a meaning of going through the process, be it a big fat Greek wedding or Vegas style, do it. By all means. It should mean something... But in reality, it is nothing... No assurance, no security... why? because people break promises. People are weak, they give in under pressure, they cannot resist temptation. The "first humans" were punished for not being able to resist temptation. It's a major theme of the entire humanity. Our egotism, and greed. It extends to all aspects of life, from capitalism to sex. If you haven't observed this human frailty so far, I suggest you take another long hard look.

Hoo boy! So much to address....

First Juliet - Don't be hypocrite... Every woman needs a man. You are either deverginized at a young age by a man.. Who validated you being a woman?? Your career?? I don't understand what makes me a hypocrite, could you elaborate on that please? I was not "devirginized" at a young age, I waited until I was good and ready. As for the validation, I do not need validation from a man, my career, any other person or really any outside source at all. THAT was my point. I am a woman in my own right! I need validation only from myself. What I think of myself and how I feel about myself is more important to my internal happiness and contentment than what someone else thinks of me.

Second, Ross22 - Actually I think tally's point is kind of sad as to suggest finding a mate is not important! Baboon was correct in saying that I never said that. :shrug: Of course finding a partner is important, I just don't think that marriage is the ultimate grand accomplishment in life.

Third, Juliet again - she desire not for guys as maybe she wants not the male gender so you better not aspire tally to show anything to you men!! Why do you think I don't desire men? Just because I'm a little cynical about marriage? Your naivety is showing....But I understand you haven't been around here for all that long so you don't really know me, but you will quickly learn that it certainly is the menfolk I desire :p

Fourth, Baboon - Does your wife know you're trying to commandeer photos of other women's bewbies? ;)


I suppose I should close up by just clarifying my position a bit. "Bagging a man" and getting married is not my ultimate goal in life. Yes I do want to find a partner, yes I do want to find love, but that is only part of my life's journey. There is so much on this earth and in this life to experience, there is so much that people can learn and so many ways to grow as a person and as a human. Life can be so fulfilling, you just have to open your eyes, mind and heart to EVERYTHING, not just the opposite sex (or same sex for some people :D)

Tally
Hoo boy! So much to address....

First Juliet - I don't understand what makes me a hypocrite, could you elaborate on that please?
------------->Let's face it as we women don't want to grow old without a husband, without a man beside us.. We could be rich, wealthy and successful to our careers, but still finding our own partner in life is also included as it can be called one of your best asset when we be able to find a good man in our lives.. We can have material things, we can have good cars, we can be lawyers, doctors, we can have mansions and all.. But finding a man to marry is hard.. especially in your country that no ones loves marriages but just living in together... :D
And since no one loves marriages in america, you suppose have this idea on when you will find a guy who will be offering you marriage and that somehow an achievement to you... :p

Why do you think I don't desire men?
-------------->So you just desire men to what if not in marrying?? LOL... :P

She's looking for a heart-throb.

...maybe without the heart. :P

I'm still confused.....perhaps it's your precarious grasp of the english language? A hypocrite is someone who says one thing and then goes out and does the exact opposite....I'm still not sure where exactly that fits into our discussion. Do you think I'm saying I don't want or need a man but that I'm out there looking for one right now?

I never said that I don't want or need a man, in fact I'm dating a really fabulous one right now that I feel very lucky to be with. What I am saying is that having a man does not automatically make me complete, that comes only from within oneself. Finding a man to marry is not my ultimate life's goal....my ultimate life's goal is to simply be happy. Having a partner to share that happiness with is just part of the goal.

She's looking for a heart-throb.

...maybe without the heart. :P
he most certainly must have a heart! I may not be all woozy lovey dovey like Juliet but I'm sure that we do value many of the same qualities in the opposite sex.

I'm still confused.....perhaps it's your precarious grasp of the english language? A hypocrite is someone who says one thing and then goes out and does the exact opposite....I'm still not sure where exactly that fits into our discussion. Do you think I'm saying I don't want or need a man but that I'm out there looking for one right now?

I never said that I don't want or need a man, in fact I'm dating a really fabulous one right now that I feel very lucky to be with. What I am saying is that having a man does not automatically make me complete, that comes only from within oneself. Finding a man to marry is not my ultimate life's goal....my ultimate life's goal is to simply be happy. Having a partner to share that happiness with is just part of the goal.


But finding a man to marry is hard.. especially in your country that no ones loves marriages but just living in together...
And since no one loves marriages in america, you suppose have this idea on when you will find a guy who will be offering you marriage and that somehow an achievement to you...

Why do you think I don't desire men?
-------------->So you just desire men to what if not in marrying?? LOL... So i know now what you want...That you want a man to be just your bed lover! :P

You know, as far as I am concerned marriage favors the girl and any woman that aggrees to shack up with a guy will ultimately pay the price in her old age as woman are not very marketable after age 60, just my observations!

I am not saying that there is anything wrong with living together, I am just saying that for a woman there is a certain window of opportunity and after a certain period of time and again I said 60 but obviously that is just a ball park, its much harder for a woman as it is for a guy! Again just my observations!

I am not saying that there is anything wrong with living together, I am just saying that for a woman there is a certain window of opportunity and after a certain period of time and again I said 60 but obviously that is just a ball park, its much harder for a woman as it is for a guy! Again just my observations!

True, but that's just it, these women aren't in their 60s. Even in their mid 30s women still think they still have plenty of life left and I find it more often then not they want to find someone and live with someone, but not necessarily get married. Doesn't mean they don't love the guy and want to be with him, it's just the idea of marriage turns them off. As it does to alot of guys too.

A little example is my girlfriend and I have been together about 4 years, and even though we have a house and a child together we aren't married. Not even engaged. And truth be told I want it more than she does. The reasoning behind that is I am almost 30 with a child. She on the other hand is turning 21 this month and feels this is right for right now, but who knows down the road. She lives her life a day at a time, while I think the opposite.

All I am saying that after a certain period of time it becomes much harder for a woman to get married thats all, if that is your intention to never get married then more power to you but it seems that there are a lot of lonely old woman in my city and I have to wonder if this is the reason as they let their youth slip away!

All I am saying that after a certain period of time it becomes much harder for a woman to get married thats all

I won't argue with you on that one. I don't know why, but alot of women find older guys attractive. And in my case, if my gf and I don't work out then I will probably be safe because latin american women generally date guys much older then they are.

God bless them.

you suppose have this idea on when you will find a guy who will be offering you marriage and that somehow an achievement to you...

Who are you to say how things are supposed to be or how I am supposed to feel? Obviously you and I have very, very different views on love, marriage and life and that's fine. Who says I have to wait for a guy to offer me marriage anyway? When I find the right man and I want to be married if he hasn't asked me I'm not going to wait around, I'll go ahead and ask him.

Why do you think I don't desire men?
-------------->So you just desire men to what if not in marrying?? LOL... So i know now what you want...That you want a man to be just your bed lover! :P
:rolleyes: Just because I'm not looking for a husband right now doesn't mean I'm just some hussy looking for a good f*ck and I want nothing more. Quit being so narrow minded.:rolleyes:

Who are you to say how things are supposed to be or how I am supposed to feel? Obviously you and I have very, very different views on love, marriage and life and that's fine. Who says I have to wait for a guy to offer me marriage anyway? When I find the right man and I want to be married if he hasn't asked me I'm not going to wait around, I'll go ahead and ask him.



From tally:
perhaps it's your precarious grasp of the english language? A hypocrite is someone who says one thing and then goes out and does the exact opposite....
---------->LOL, then marrying now is your answer... Look at you of not favoring this marrying thingy before but then this time want this marrying if find the right man?? :rofl:

:rolleyes: Just because I'm not looking for a husband right now doesn't mean I'm just some hussy looking for a good f*ck and I want nothing more. Quit being so narrow minded.:rolleyes:

From tally:
"Bagging a man" and getting married is not my ultimate goal in life.

My answer:
----------->who's narrow minded? Who is the one having this close mind about marrriage?? I just laugh at you tally...:D

True, but that's just it, these women aren't in their 60s. Even in their mid 30s women still think they still have plenty of life left and I find it more often then not they want to find someone and live with someone, but not necessarily get married. Doesn't mean they don't love the guy and want to be with him, it's just the idea of marriage turns them off. As it does to alot of guys too.




All i can say is that, her love is not enough to marry you... And that's the sad part because majority of the women there in your place have no plan of marrying.. :nonono:

From tally:
perhaps it's your precarious grasp of the english language? A hypocrite is someone who says one thing and then goes out and does the exact opposite....
---------->LOL, then marrying now is your answer... Look at you of not favoring this marrying thingy before but then this time want this marrying if find the right man?? :rofl:

Sometimes I wonder if I'm talking to a brick wall here! :eek7:

My original first post in this thread said this....

I assume some day I will probably get married but I don't see it as this glowing white end-all to my life's journey, it's not my goal, it's just something along the way that will probably happen and when it does I'll probably love it but I'm not out looking for it, not pining away that I'm 28 and not married yet, not even really caring right now

And I have not waivered on that position once!

*sigh*

Sometimes I wonder if I'm talking to a brick wall here! :eek7:

My original first post in this thread said this....


And I have not waivered on that position once!

*sigh*



LOL... that's the post not included in our conversation... :eek: Remember that you had said this too...
From tally:
"Bagging a man" and getting married is not my ultimate goal in life.
I'll probably love it but I'm not out looking for it..



sounds like you love to eat pizza but not looking or wanting for it! hahaha... :D

It's women like Juliet that make men want to screw picnic tables.

She's looking for a heart-throb.

...maybe without the heart. :P

So just the throb then?

It's women like Juliet that make men want to screw picnic tables.
:werd:

I'm just wondering why it matters if a woman isn't married by the time she's 60. I don't understand this idiotic idea that getting married is the ultimate achievement in life. Even if you do get married, chances are you won't die at the same time as your spouse, so you're going to die alone anyway. So what?

yes true... as when you're married, you can't cheat or you can't have multiple partners or else, the outcome is divorce... :D

I won't argue with you on that one. I don't know why, but alot of women find older guys attractive. And in my case, if my gf and I don't work out then I will probably be safe because latin american women generally date guys much older then they are.

God bless them.

You will find that in most third world countries the old traditional values are still there! And yes you are right as woman dont mind marrying a guy that is older by as much as 20 years from her although 10 years is more common! Its a matter of personal opinion but one thing you will find and that is you just wont find as many people that are lonely in these countries and I guess its because you marry for life there! I feel the worst thing that can happen to you is to find yourself one day being old and alone!

It's women like Juliet that make men want to screw picnic tables.

Its a matter of personal oppinion Mr. E as you are looking two very different cultures here! You may seem to think that freedom and not getting married is the better way but you have to ask yourself why are there so many old lonely people in the developed world? Is our way really better than the traditional ways that our parents shared many decades ago? For me the traditional way is far better and also more stable for our offsprings! Maybee that is why crime is so rampant in our countries because childeren take a back seat to carreers! Just something to think about!

:rolleyes: Just because I'm not looking for a husband right now doesn't mean I'm just some hussy looking for a good f*ck and I want nothing more. Quit being so narrow minded.:rolleyes:

Question for you Tally! Dont you think that a stable married couple is a much better environment for the kids? Because I really have to wonder if the reason our kids are always getting into trouble as teenagers has to do with the lack of attention they are getting as they are growing up! Just a thought!

So just the throb then?
:devil:

yes true... as when you're married, you can't cheat or you can't have multiple partners or else, the outcome is divorce...

Fear and intimidation makes always for a relationship healthy with lots of sex and rice and everything nice. :rofl:

If you don't keep applying heat, of course. The problem is, too many people do think of it as a hot tub. They fill the tub with hot water, then climb in and just lay there relaxing and not doing anything else, and expect it to keep bringing them pleasure and fulfillment.

True. That's was just an old saying I thought I would throw in. Marriage with the right person under the right circumstances can be the best thing in the world.

All i can say is that, her love is not enough to marry you... And that's the sad part because majority of the women there in your place have no plan of marrying.. :nonono:

She has said more than once that if it came down to me leaving because we were not married then she would do it in a heartbeat. I just don't think we are ready. Our daughter and our mortgage aside we still don't know each other. I mean, I do, but I find out something new about her almost every day.

We came to a conclusion almost 2 years ago that we were either going to get married or buy a house. Since we would have to pay for our own wedding and she wanted a nice one, we decided to get a house. A much better financial decision. Marriage is still not out of the question, but we do have some things to iron out in the mean time.



You will find that in most third world countries the old traditional values are still there! And yes you are right as woman dont mind marrying a guy that is older by as much as 20 years from her although 10 years is more common! Its a matter of personal opinion but one thing you will find and that is you just wont find as many people that are lonely in these countries and I guess its because you marry for life there! I feel the worst thing that can happen to you is to find yourself one day being old and alone!

Which leads to reason why these younger women wanting to get married earlier. My girlfriend is from Venezuela, but has become more Americanized in the fact that she doesn't want to get married (at least right now). There is a large culture difference, and I just find it hard to believe these little hot 20 year old girls are going to fall in love with someone 15 years older than them be incredibly faithful for the rest of their lives and not think a thing of it. But it's true. I have a couple friends from 3rd world south american countries and they do it all the time. These girls are incredibly committed.

LOL... that's the post not included in our conversation... :eek: Remember that you had said this too...
From tally:
"Bagging a man" and getting married is not my ultimate goal in life.
I'll probably love it but I'm not out looking for it..


Yes I did say that.....and it says exactly what my first post said too! So what are we arguing back and forth for? I don't know if it's you that's not understanding me or me not understanding you, whatever, it doesn't really matter anyway!

What is marriage for you? What is in your mind when we say marriage? I want you guys to say something here... :)

Hay Juliet, I'll marry ya!

Gimme some piccys OK? Your in the Phillipines, right?

For our honeymoon, we'll make a movie called "Banged in Bang-Cock"!!

Yes I did say that.....and it says exactly what my first post said too! So what are we arguing back and forth for? I don't know if it's you that's not understanding me or me not understanding you, whatever, it doesn't really matter anyway!

In the first place what affects you if i cosider marriage an achivement to myself?? As you the first one who replied to my post?

If we have different views about marriage, that is because we have different culture.. And you better shut up girl.. :p

Question for you Tally! Dont you think that a stable married couple is a much better environment for the kids? Because I really have to wonder if the reason our kids are always getting into trouble as teenagers has to do with the lack of attention they are getting as they are growing up! Just a thought!
You don't think that single parents can do an adequate job of bringing up a child? I know some really wonderful people that were brought up in single parent households...

And teenagers will be teenagers, they are pretty much the same now as they were 60 years go, they have always gotten into trouble and they always will get into trouble regardless of what generation they are from, that's just the nature of the beast, it's just a stage of their development. Some will get into more trouble than others, sometimes it will be harmless, sometimes it will be major, that's just the way it is in my opinion.

In general though I'm leaning towards not having children, which is another opinion that many people look at me weird for. It's just so widely accepted and expected that we as humans grow up, get married, have kids and die and yes that's usually how it goes but that doesn't mean that I'm a bad person for perhaps not wanting to partake in that cycle. Note I did say perhaps. I'm still young (by my own standards) so I don't actually know if I want kids or not just yet. I just don't know if I want to bring a child into this world, and there are so many homeless children who need families anyway, and we're actually getting to the point where the world's population size is becoming a problem. If I change my mind and do decide I want children I will likely adopt. but that's a whole different thread!! :p

In the first place what affects you if i cosider marriage an achivement to myself??

Considering marraige as an 'achievement' is sinful, and reminds me of a couple broads I used to date. All they wanted was marriage. I was just a potential means to that end. Personally, all I wanted was casual sex. I came out victorious in those battles. ;)

If we have different views about marriage, that is because we have different culture..

No doubt many primitive, barbaric cultures are really flucked up.

Considering marraige as an 'achievement' is sinful, and reminds me of a couple broads I used to date. All they wanted was marriage. I was just a potential means to that end. Personally, all I wanted was casual sex. I came out victorious in those battles. ;)



No doubt many primitive, barbaric cultures are really flucked up.


I don't think you have morals and values as me myself would just want to have sex with one person.. You need sluts and i am not!

I don't think you have morals and values as me myself would just want to have sex with one person.. You need sluts and i am not!Bullshit. Women who have sex are not sluts. Welcome to the 21st century where we understand that women want and need sex.

Bullshit. Women who have sex are not sluts. Welcome to the 21st century where we understand that women want and need sex.


I am not talking to you..I am talking with Snouter.. This is what race i am being brought as i think sex of being sacred.. if not a slut, then what?? :D

If you guys are into casual sex, then do it as i don't care of your opinion about screwing with plenty of guys..


:hmm::p

I am not talking to you..I am talking with Snouter.. This is what race i am being brought as i think sex of being sacred..Doesn't mean I'm not going to call you on some bullshit like that. if not a slut, then what?? :DWoman. Just plain, ordinary, natural, healthy woman.

Doesn't mean I'm not going to call you on some bullshit like that.Woman. Just plain, ordinary, natural, healthy woman.



I don't care whatever! :D

just because a woman loves sex doesn't mean she's out having sex with multiple partners like a tramp....a woman can love, want and need sex and still value it highly....

just because a woman loves sex doesn't mean she's out having sex with multiple partners like a tramp....a woman can love, want and need sex and still value it highly....


I am not saying that a woman need not sex.. me myself would just want to have sex with one person.. This is what i posted my dear tally.. :)

And if you are again pushing this multiple partners, then you do it yourself.. :D

just because a woman loves sex doesn't mean she's out having sex with multiple partners like a tramp....a woman can love, want and need sex and still value it highly....


The problem with women in the west is that they want their cake and eat it too! Dont get me wrong as I am all for freedom of choice but I have noticed a pattern and that is that the woman want to have all the pleasures of men but none of the responsibilities such as when it comes time to buying a house 9 out of 10 times its the guy that has to fork up the money and also its the man that is the main bread winner, I know that there are some women reading this and saying that they contribute as much if not more then men in the relationship but that is the exception and not the rule as in most cases its the man that does most of the earning! Now having said that why would any man want to support an aging girl that has already had sex with 10 or more guys and getting that same sex that others had gotten for free!

Once again just a thought!

Hay Juliet, I'll marry ya!

Gimme some piccys OK? Your in the Phillipines, right?

For our honeymoon, we'll make a movie called "Banged in Bang-Cock"!!

Bankock is in Thailand!

Its a matter of personal oppinion Mr. E as you are looking two very different cultures here!

I don't think Juliet represents the Philippine culture.

Juliet represents Juliet. That's it.

I don't think Juliet represents the Philippine culture.

Well i am not pushing you to believe me either MR.. :D

I don't think Juliet represents the Philippine culture.

I say she does as I have been there and I have met her!:)


Excluding the bar girls of Manila, philippines still believe in being a virgin until marriage!

Juliet represents Juliet. That's it.

Yes as some might not agree and that is their opinion.. :cool:

I say she does as I have been there and I have met her!:)Oh well, if you say it then it must be true! :rolleyes:

Juliet represents Juliet. That's it.

Being able to see both sides of the coin I can say that Juliet is just experiencing culture shock as to her a woman having multiple partners is just so taboo to her and to the philippines in general as I have seen first hand the old traditions that exist there!!

Oh well, if you say it then it must be true! :rolleyes:

LOL OK then!:)

Being able to see both sides of the coin I can say that Juliet is just experiencing culture shock as to her a woman having multiple partners is just so taboo to her and to the philippines in general as I have seen first hand the old traditions that exist there!!
Can't you mail order a bride from the Philippines?

Can't you mail order a bride from the Philippines?Yes, and they're guaranteed to be virgins or you get your money back. :nice:

Can't you mail order a bride from the Philippines?


I am not quite sure what you mean here, but mail order brides as you are refering to is illegal in the philippines!

Yes, and they're guaranteed to be virgins or you get your money back. :nice:

LOL works for me!:)

It might be illegal, but search for it online and you can find it easily. It just seems to clash with the "old traditions" as much as the topic at hand. But that could just be my own brain in its exhausted state drawig parallels.

It might be illegal, but search for it online and you can find it easily. It just seems to clash with the "old traditions" as much as the topic at hand. But that could just be my own brain in its exhausted state drawig parallels.

Not the same thing as its mostly dating introduction sites and so you still have to go to the philippines to meet your gf or future bride so its not really a mail order bride but no different than a blind date that your friends arrange for you!

It would be fair to say that some people in third world countries just want a ticket out but if you look hard enough you can find yourself a good woman that still has the values that our mothers have assuming of course that is what you are looking for!:)

http://www.afilipinalady.com/
case in point.

Like I said Jwreck, filipina introduction sites not mail order brides!

Like I said Jwreck, filipina introduction sites not mail order brides!Yeah, because that's like, so totally different. :|

I think if I had to marry a woman here in Canada I would rather die alone as I have worked hard for what I have and the thought of being with one of these over the hill women that just wants to live with me for two years and run to their lawyers is just not for me, if it works for you more power to you!

Yeah, because that's like, so totally different. :|

Please expain to me the difference between that site and the sites here in North America such as E-harmony?

Please expain to me the difference between that site and the sites here in North America such as E-harmony?No. I have better things to do.

No. I have better things to do.


Because there is no difference!:)

Because there is no difference!:)If that's what you want to tell yourself.

If that's what you want to tell yourself.

Works for me!:)

Works for me!:)


Muah sweetheart, it works for both of us.. :D

The problem with women in the west is that they want their cake and eat it too! Dont get me wrong as I am all for freedom of choice but I have noticed a pattern and that is that the woman want to have all the pleasures of men but none of the responsibilities such as when it comes time to buying a house 9 out of 10 times its the guy that has to fork up the money and also its the man that is the main bread winner, I know that there are some women reading this and saying that they contribute as much if not more then men in the relationship but that is the exception and not the rule as in most cases its the man that does most of the earning! Now having said that why would any man want to support an aging girl that has already had sex with 10 or more guys and getting that same sex that others had gotten for free!

Once again just a thought!

Why would you say that women want all the pleasures of man but none of the responsibilities? First of all you're insinuating that men get to have all these pleasures....like sex before marriage....and that's okay. Boy what a double standard! Second, the man paying for everything is just as old fashioned as the rest of this crap we've been discussing. Maybe that's how it works in Canada (although I really don't view canada as a "traditional old country" but that's beside the point) but seriously get with the program. Do you think women's lib was just about sexual freedom? NO! It was about all different kinds of freedom, freedom from having to depend on a husband for social status, freedom of choice in both professional and personal life, being able to choose financial freedom, etc. One of my very best friends owns her own house, she bought it herself, her boyfriend has lived there for 2 years now for free, and she's not the only example I could come up with. . My mother owns her own house bought solely with her own money...I could go on. Yes you did say that there are "exceptions to the rule" but I don't think they are exceptions at all. In most countries women these days have the opportunity to make as much if not more than men, and many women choose to do so. The time I most often see a man as the sole bread winner these days is when the woman is a stay-at-home-mom, and that's just a choice that each couple has to make.

Personally I don't ever expect (or even want) a man to support me, I'm all about the 50/50 financial relationship.

And here is "just a thought" for you....who says that the "old traditions" you're always talking about are better than the new? Personally I think we are progressing....

Why would you say that women want all the pleasures of man but none of the responsibilities? First of all you're insinuating that men get to have all these pleasures....like sex before marriage....and that's okay. Boy what a double standard! Second, the man paying for everything is just as old fashioned as the rest of this crap we've been discussing. Maybe that's how it works in Canada (although I really don't view canada as a "traditional old country" but that's beside the point) but seriously get with the program. Do you think women's lib was just about sexual freedom? NO! It was about all different kinds of freedom, freedom from having to depend on a husband for social status, freedom of choice in both professional and personal life, being able to choose financial freedom, etc. One of my very best friends owns her own house, she bought it herself, her boyfriend has lived there for 2 years now for free, and she's not the only example I could come up with. . My mother owns her own house bought solely with her own money...I could go on. Yes you did say that there are "exceptions to the rule" but I don't think they are exceptions at all. In most countries women these days have the opportunity to make as much if not more than men, and many women choose to do so. The time I most often see a man as the sole bread winner these days is when the woman is a stay-at-home-mom, and that's just a choice that each couple has to make.

Personally I don't ever expect (or even want) a man to support me, I'm all about the 50/50 financial relationship.

Like I said tally its just an observation thats all, if you are putting up 50/50 in ther relationship then good for you but this is not the way I see it most of the time! This is not to disrespect woman its just an observstion that I have noticed thats all.

And here is "just a thought" for you....who says that the "old traditions" you're always talking about are better than the new? Personally I think we are progressing....

When the day comes that in separation the man gets half of HER assets then I will agree with you until that time comes I have to say that this is not the norm! Sorry but until you give me solid proof that a girl contributes as much as a man then I cant agree with you!

Also like I said there are alot of lonely old women and I am not really sure if it has anything to do with the fact of more women waiting longer to get married and finding out its too late! I really dont know!

Also like I said there are alot of lonely old women and I am not really sure if it has anything to do with the fact of more women waiting longer to get married and finding out its too late! I really dont know!
There are also a lot of lonely old men....:|

Also, it is never too late to make the commitment and get married unless the only reason you're getting married is to have children. My aunt who is in her 60's was married last year, she couldn't be happier :nice:

What is marriage for you? What is in your mind when we say marriage? I want you guys to say something here... :)

Legal permission to have sex.

Legal permission to have sex.


Thats an interesting point!:)

it's not even legal permission though.....it's religious permission......

I am not saying that a woman need not sex.. me myself would just want to have sex with one person.. This is what i posted my dear tally.. :)

And if you are again pushing this multiple partners, then you do it yourself.. :D

Something tells me Juliet would be a nagging wife.